Very entertaining stories!
And unique characters, they hooked me with their weirdness.
Thanks yall for the fun reads!
Rabbit: your thumbnail process seems to pay off well. Your story was very easy to follow, and the way you presented the characters was very complete and interesting. My only critique is that Your character was drawn very fluidly, but the other characters (particularly Aesimi) looked a bit wonky in spots. Your character was a little more consistent. I guess thats just part of the challenge. Cool concept of Tanuky collecting all these things. Great battle set-up.
Pel: I liked your linework for the most part, only problem I had with it was the \"shading\". Using maybe some screentones, or flat colors under the line work would make your comic look WAY better. Maybe just some more hatching variety? It works in some spots, but in others i'm like: \"Oh, the side of that building just has some diagonal lines/scribbles drawn on it.\" I see it as LINES and not SHADING. Just my taste tho. Great story! I loved the taco heisting scheme, and some great liveliness in the characters themselves. Good consistency between you and your opponents characters, but I thought Tanuky was more of just a cameo than your opponent.
Gave rabbit the edge for professionalism and mastery of story flow while still being funny.
Great battle!
Rabbit²: I like where your colors are going, though I feel the ones you used in the intros are stronger..or at least more solid, but yeah, just one page with it, lets go ahead. Your lines are improving I think, though I think you can spend even more time on it's refining, maybe with a detailed sketch?
Other that thing, looking real good. It's very funny heh
Pelica: HEhe it's real funny, but I didn't really got what the trophy is.. rotten tacos? I guess Rabbit won't have a least of problem updating his sheet, in case you win. (not that this should be the focus of the trophy match but hehehe, i think you can get what I mean).
Artwise, I think the lines are a step back from the last work, since most part of the drawings this time have a sketch look, rather than something roundier, or at least stronger, as in Ghas fight.. though the difference is slim, this one has a \"bigger\" sketch aspect. I totally recommend more time spent on sketches and on inking, it will sure do you better, since your style is going nice!
Good luck you guys!
Rabbit-I really thought the story was adorable and you did a good job nailing Aesimi/Beethoven's personalities. You also had very good pacing which was great. I do however think your lineart needs quite a lot of work. While you're getting better at varying your linewidths, I would like to see you slow down and really make those lines shine and attempt to do more detailed stuff. I know you do a more anime like style which is totally fine, but the style is never an excuse to not go batshit crazy on details. (Tekkonkinkreet, Berserk, Akira) Make sure you are devoting as much time to your backgrounds as your characters, nothing captivates me more in a comic than lavishly detailed unique backgrounds, they are just as important as the characters.
Pelica-Pretty much the same as Rabbit, you really must slow down on your lineart and make it shine. I like that you're not relying on color but you have to really give your lineart love to make a black and white battle look awesome. And of course there's the backgrounds as well XD I did however really enjoy the story and you got me to laugh which is good. I just want to see the art to back up these fun stories you've been doing!
Dear SQUIDMAN:
Wow, nothing gets past you. Such well-trained eyes. 0_o
I didn't realize that the HURK! panel was too small until the scanning stage, so I biggified it in PhotoShop. It WAS hand-drawn, though. And I stand by my copy-pasted panel when applied to the \"awkward pause\" gag, because I find it to hurt the joke if the slightest detail is different. I'm regretting that toning in the second-to-last panel now, too. >.>
Dear Pelica:
You totally BROUGHT the FUNNY, as usual. I wasn't disappointed! I love the way you drew him all big and squishy. X3
It's a bummer about those first two pages. You should contact Wei RIGHT NOW!! He's gonna wanna know if something's screwy with the uploader. It would suck if this went into the Archives all bass-ackward like that! 8(
ROFL, I'm just now reading Rabbit's comic and it had me laughing the whole time! XDD Omg...
@Kozi: X3 Eeee thanks!
@Ari: XDDD *flails* No, YOU'RE Crazy!! XDDDD
@Dimension: The line widths looked better before I scanned and shrunk the pages XD Lol. I guess I'll have to make more a contrast next time
@Squidman: XD Yup, one and two were switched... for some reason. O_o I'm pretty sure i uploaded it right... oh well. xD
Rabbit: Excellent introduction to the character! I have to say, I particularly like the swirling smoke as Tanuky works his magic.
-page 3, the HURK! panel, looks like some of it was done in a computer program, and it's just a little bit distracting because it's not consistent with everything else... If you have to switch to a paint program, I would suggest at least cleaning up the lines a little so that they are crisper.. one thing that gives digital lines away is their feathered ends.
-Another consistency thing, the trees for the first few pages are detailed, there are leaves and bark, then later on, it's scribbly.
-AHA! I see your copied panel! I'm almost willing to let it slide because it kinda goes with the joke, but it still feels like cheating, to me...
Pelica: This was really funny, the cardboard dudes are so rediculous.
I suggest working on streghthening the lineart, in some places it seems doodly and incomplete.
Agreeing with Ari, the panels tend to be fairly bare. If there isn't anything you can fill up the panel with, consider making it smaller.
Really entertaining match!
@RabbitRabbit: Lovin' the story dude! I think you did pretty great on the quality of the comic too, the first page was sweet. Tanuky is such an awesome charecter, I can't wait to see more or him in your comics. ;) nice work.
@Pelica: You made me laugh so hard XD the whole \"I think my face is stuck\" thing was waaay too funny. x3 I do think your inking could have been better though, hmm...perhaps try to vary your line widths. Even so, you still did pretty good job. :3
awesome stuff guys!
Rabbit: hahaha oh my God, i loved the story! The way Tanuky tried to get food was clever, and i think you got down Aesimi's and Beethoven's personality really well. It felt like the real ones XD hahah the ending KILLED me! I had a feeling she was gonna ruin the wish, but i never excpected her to make a wish like THAT! and she had an explaination for it and everything... XD i liked the inks and everyone looked pretty good, but i think you could have added more to the backgrounds =3 most of the time it felt like they were in a giant white room cuz there was nothing ( i do that too sometimes, so i can't say anything XD ) great overall and i can't wait until your next comic! <3
Pelica: HAHA YOU are fucking CRAZY! XD it's awesome how you fit all those jokes into a short little comic. i couldn't pull myself away from it! haha Aesimi is so cute, you just gotta love her, and Beethoven too. they're sneaky little bitches, huh? XD the art work was simple, but i still could tell what was going on where there was action. i would say the same thing to you about the backgrounds as i did to Rabbit =3
Now i can't wait until i battle you; i KNOW you're gonna make something crazy! XD
great on both sides! =3
Oh you guys XD hahaha!
RabbitxRabbit- Happy birthday! :D
I really dug, not only that lovely color intro page, but the overall look of your side of the battle. It looks like you really took your time with detail and managed your workload very well (much to the chagrin of your English grade. gah @_@).
I like that Aesimi's humor came across and the 'special something' was amusingly anti-climatic. You totally beat out Pelica by ways of quality- it went down smooth.
Pelica- Woman you crack me UP. I wish your quality was a bit sharper, but you seriously have the funny. Your fighters have a wonderful dynamic I love reading and your facial expressions make me go squee. :) The trenchcoat 'lets make a deal' gag was my favorite out of them all- Aesimi's face getting stuck in sparkly mode being a close second.
Wonderful work from the both of you :D
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