Retribution: Caelum's Ultimatum / Veronica Nightingale and Miyajima Minori

Retribution: Caelum's Ultimatum — Veronica Nightingale and Miyajima Minori

by Majikura and Jiisuri


924 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8




Critiques & Comments
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Happy September 20th! -Reecer6
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216 comments
# 11   Posted: Sep 5 2018, 07:48 PM
yoooo i love how you guys are really trying to evolve and develop the retribution scene!! this is an awesome little scene and is exactly the sort of reason i was hype to hear about the event. it injects so much into the intercity and intracity relationships! it's also the sort of thing i WANTED to make when i made anvil but have thus far failed in doing anything notable, so it's kind of inspirational too! AND OF COURSE my girl's there so i double love it <3

      Edited Sep 5 2018,  07:49 PM by Happy September 20th! -Reecer6

Radji
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463 comments
# 10   Posted: Sep 3 2018, 01:56 PM
void is in some deep shit.
Space elevator and sky: out ( or mostly) cuz in caelum hands
Access to the sea: Mostly Out cuz they failes to get the docks

gotta think of other ways to export/import.

hmmmmmmm......

Majikura
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461 comments
# 9   Posted: Sep 3 2018, 08:21 AM
It can also be interpreted that "Caelum Airspace" is just a filibuster legal jargon that Veronica uses to make everyone think she owns the entire sky.

when writing this comic, I noticed that Void City doesn't have a single exportable good or service.  Horizon's Business is mainly shipping and  transportation (with anti-meta research on the side). so for Void City to try and start a business in a market that Horizon is not a part of (space tourism/travel), Veronica is simultaneously trying to strangle Void's income and monopolize the market.

yarnwitch
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201 comments
# 8   Posted: Sep 2 2018, 10:26 AM
I AM REALLY HAPPY TO SEE THIS.
since I went through the void archives, i've really enjoyed the nightingale plotlines, so seeing this makes me really excited. I wonder how I could get involved!!!!
My main complaint is sometimes there are lines on Arena's abdomen that I think are meant to show that she's shredded as heck, but because you guys are emphasizing the lower ones, it looks like she's stuffing her pants. (page one first panel) which is fine, if she wants to do that. I just don't know if its intentional or not.

Overall, I'll reiterate: I loved this a lot. The pacing was great, the story is superb, and I WANT IN ON THIS.

Jiisuri
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125 comments
# 7   Posted: Sep 2 2018, 08:14 AM
Makes you think don't it duel? :3

Some food for thought too: Does old void as we knew it that caelum took a portion out of exist anymore? Also, have any of these cities even laid claim to airspace before caelum took it? And would any of these matter in this current state of power between each faction?

I do look forward to any work that might build upon this.

PS: Thanks for the comments and critique guys. This work was more or less plotted by both kura and I, sketched by me, then edited and inked up by kura while he was busy with a house move. Kudos to him.

      Edited Sep 2 2018,  08:17 AM by Jiisuri

ArtsandGoodies
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79 comments
# 6   Posted: Sep 1 2018, 11:01 PM
I really like this story and love the blackspots in this as they show just enough in just the right places, the backdrop in particular is pretty awesome. I also like what you did with the screens to make them different tones. the only minor thing I could say is the tails of the bubbles seem a bit short ending a little too soon before getting to the head, this is only an issue on page 1 the bottom panel were it almost looks like the Greece on screen is saying Veronica's line. Super awesome comic that was pretty fun and good at connecting all the weird plots  in void together.

Hellis
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155 comments
# 5   Posted: Sep 1 2018, 05:15 PM
Duel, I think its on us, as fellow writers and artists, to continue the narrative and build upon it. We've been given a big ol plate of usefull info and scenarios.

William_Duel
Community Manager
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885 comments
# 4   Posted: Sep 1 2018, 04:02 PM
I do like these sorts of comics that address multiple stories and it was very cool.  There's one thing I have always wondered though since the creation of Caelum.  Why do they have any authority over Void's airspace?  I've always been curious about that.  Internally my logic was always that since the meteor and reconstruction, that the city just didn't have the military force to fight it.  In the meantime, Arena has been building up the NVCPD.  But probably due to Arma and other events, the city keeps getting wrecked which means they can't spare the effort to oppose Caelum.  But this is the part that throws me.  Why would Veronica make threats about the space elevator?  Caelum's 'airspace' is stolen from the city.  Their claim is basically the same as me walking into someone's house and suddenly claiming I live in that room.  I guess I'm saying that as a reader I'd feel more satisfied with some sort of reasoning for why the current situation works the way it does.  Like most of what I've written is just my own speculation and nothing that's really been stated in any comic.

Hellis
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155 comments
# 3   Posted: Sep 1 2018, 11:31 AM
Writing: First of all, Kudos on combining both outcomes of our battle, and making it weave into the retribution arc so well. I love the way you guys built the tension between each party, the back and forth was exellent. Imo, this is the way bigger picture exposition should be handled. This felt very much like a boardmeeting ,where points are brought up. Its ideal for what you guys were trying to achieve and I am super hyped for this.

Art: I love me some effectual spot blacks. while you obviously had to cut corners, I think he spot blacks were the the way to go to fill negative space. I really liked the feel of the panels, some of it was really good. I really enjoyed the way your two mesh.

Shen
Global Moderator
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1217 comments
# 2   Posted: Sep 1 2018, 11:29 AM
DAAAAAMN Veronica, you sly thing!! Coming up with ways to turn a bad situation into a profitable one, that IS impressive. I like how you tied so many stories together, like Keito and Raygun's Kaiju fight, Wizzie's space jail, Hellis' elevator, make the world feel all the more connected to each other. Artwise, i LOVE how Veronica and Minori are in shadow for the whole negotiation, compared to Anvil and Arena in the light. I feel like this did a lot with very little. bringing a bunch of things together and then pushing it all just a bit further.

Majikura
Artist
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461 comments
# 1   Posted: Aug 31 2018, 08:47 PM
apologies if it feels like i cut corners.  I'm on a strict time schedule due to my move.

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Sep 8th, 2018
Votes Cast: 21
Page Views: 427

 

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