Cutie Mark vs. Grita The Reaper

Cutie Mark vs. Grita The Reaper


391 points
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326 points
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Critiques & Comments
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Rhimwill
Artist
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97 comments
# 8   Posted: Apr 8 2018, 10:24 AM
Mister Kent: I had a lot of fun reading this! I love your sense of humor XD
I liked how you used the animated panels! For the most part they helped enhance my understanding of the story - like the foot tapping, the clock, and even Grita licking her lips at the end - but there were a couple that felt more distracting and didn't seem to add much, like Cutie Mark's tail swishing on page 5. I hope we get to see more of this technique in future comics! Also, Hot Rhonda's my new favorite character.

Mr.PR: I had trouble understanding what was going on in some key parts of the story. In the beginning, I didn't understand right away that Grita was flashing back to some recently dead characters she had to collect. It could have been made clearer simply by having Grita make a comment like "It sucks, and the souls I have to collect are the worst" and then the audience would understand that the next panels were the annoying souls. The ending was also a little confusing when Cutie Mark jumps out the window. Having a panel where we can see Mark crashing through the window while Grita isn't paying attention would make that action much easier to understand than having it happen off-panel. I also noticed a lot of typos and strange grammar in character dialogue, so re-reading your comic a few more times before uploading or giving it to someone else to proofread might be a good idea. The portions of this comic without dialogue are very readable though! You did a good job making the character silhouettes clear in the party scene.

Futreblot
Artist
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91 comments
# 7   Posted: Apr 7 2018, 07:34 AM
Kent: I don’t have a lot to critique, the story flowed well in that I never felt like I missed anything and I was a little bit amused by hot Rhonda. I did notice that there is No contact being made between characters and Ialays found this makes characters look like paper cutouts.

MRPR: great flow as well, everyone’s critique is petty much solid so I will just expand on the silhouette comment from William. On page 4 the lighting being cast from the window wouldn’t lend to a silhouette and that really struck me and pulled me out of the story for a second. I enjoyed the Dynamic shots that took place as well.

PyrasTerran
Community Manager
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1339 comments
# 6   Posted: Apr 4 2018, 08:30 PM
Kent: Okay this one makes up for the other horse comic :D this animation gimmick is beautiful and perfectly compatible with your humor and I want you to use it all the time forever now

MrPr: I'm seeing you stretch a little outside your comfort zone a bit with poses and expressions here which si appreciated, just keep it up and also be more picky about which colors you pick: Page 3 needed more variations for sure

yarnwitch
Artist
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145 comments
# 5   Posted: Apr 4 2018, 01:31 PM
Okay can I just say I love how Cutie Mark keeps kind of escaping death overall? I hope this is a thing.

Kozispoon
Approval Committee
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911 comments
# 4   Posted: Apr 4 2018, 11:17 AM
KENT- I super dig your stylized take on Grita in your battle. Fashioning the head to have more of a face than skull made for an aesthetically nice look. Also Cutie Mark got real edgelord with that makeover. Hot Rhonda elicited a big laugh from me, fo sho. XD
For ll your animated extras, if there's one thing I wish your comic had more of, it'd be movement. Your art carries such a stiff bearing, it'd be great to see your characters loosen up. Have more of a flow panel to panel than the rigid posey impact.

MRPR1993- I personally like the pixel style of comicking, but if you're gonna go for something 'simple', it needs to be punched up to really make the style shine because you got the same stif character issue as your opponent. Give Paul Robertson a looksee for some examples of what I mean.

William_Duel
Community Manager
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862 comments
# 3   Posted: Apr 2 2018, 05:02 PM
Nice battle guys
Mister Kent: animation in comics is always a fun little thing but they're a bit distracting here.  The animation speed is just too fast.  You should slow down the tween a little.  A nice meet and greet.

Mrpr1993: I'm not a big fan of the pixellated look.  I think you should play around with different widths and sizes.  Also not a big fan of the many silhouette scenes.  They can work but I feel like you've got so many that it really just slows down clarity.

Symon_says
Artist
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36 comments
# 2   Posted: Mar 2 2018, 07:26 PM
Good luck, have fun!

MrPr1993
Artist
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55 comments
# 1   Posted: Feb 25 2018, 04:36 PM
Awwww yes here we go!

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 4 weeks
Ended: Apr 8th, 2018
Votes Cast: 19
Page Views: 206
Winner: Mister Kent

 

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