Kars vs. Louise Ambre-Aliona

Kars vs. Louise Ambre-Aliona

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by Radji

265 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9

Critiques & Comments
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# 7   Posted: Aug 6 2017, 04:04 AM
@Rhimwill:  As I told you on Discord, and I write it here for other peeps: The middle name of a child in France is that of the godparent. Kars was Lys's Godfather. I do agree that I will need to talk more about the Arakh society in itself in future comics. otherwise, it will go nowhere.

@Fukur0: Damn check the smoke detector cuz I think you roasted me !! (yes I'm proud of my joke, don't judge me) I do agree that the quality was lower than my last Louise comic. I usually try to experiment a maximum of new textures, brush, and techniques in my Comics, but sometimes it's... a lil too much. Also, that wasn't Kars in the painting, but Louise.

@Zee Indeed. Wicked plans. I need to unravel them soon.

Thank you three for your comments, may the spider-god thread in your favor.

# 6   Posted: Aug 5 2017, 04:53 PM
I too felt a little lost on the story here at first, but I think I was able to glean enough to tell that Louise has some wicked dangerous stuff planned for the future. I also enjoyed Louise and Kars' dialogue regardless.
I hope to learn more from your next comics!

# 5   Posted: Aug 2 2017, 11:38 PM
TDK: It's a shame :(

Radji: I feel the art here is a step down from the previous comic. The crosshatching is still apparent throughout, especially on Kars, but not as much as it should've been, especially in something that has no other form of shading or rendering as a matter of fact. I really like the colors in the tomb scenes on the last page but it feels really bare for a cave, especially on the walls. While I'm not against using textures in comics, the textures feel really overdone, especially with the bricks texture on the first page, the shattered glass on page 8 and the constant blood splatter. Not to mention I couldn't help but notice you copied and pasted existing paintings with filters to fill in as space while you drew the painting with Kars and Lys yourself. It really stands out and comes off as lazy honestly.

As for the story, I'm not really feeling it either. I barely anything of Louise's back story and like Rhim said, I got lost in the exposition and build up in what was supposed to be a heart breaking comic, I'm assuming. Like it just didn't do anything for me.  It took me a couple of rereads to realize that man in the painting was supposed to be Kars so the reveal of him both raising and losing a beloved spiderchild barely felt anything. I can see what you were trying to do here but some stuff felt missing.

      Edited Aug 2 2017,  11:39 PM by fukur0

# 4   Posted: Aug 1 2017, 12:39 PM
Radji: I thought the story of Kars' dead spider daughter was rather touching and a fun way to connect him to Louise's story. I think we could have used a little more detail about the other Arakhs and the threat Louise is trying to fight. I understood it because you've told me a little more about Louise's backstory, but if I didn't have that context I think I would have gotten lost in some of the more vague exposition here. Also, I just have to say that Louise's outfit is SUPER CUTE!! ^_^

# 3   Posted: Jul 31 2017, 09:12 AM
I forgive TDK. I will only send Brown recluses after you, i promise ^^
nah, seriously, it happens, i hope we'll still get to see your side, like, if you ever post it as a Beyond Battle?

# 2   Posted: Jul 4 2017, 03:20 PM

Global Moderator
# 1   Posted: Jul 3 2017, 12:02 PM
oh i look forward to this!!

Comic Details -

Drawing Time: 3 weeks
Ended: Aug 5th, 2017
Votes Cast: 13
Page Views: 385
Winner: Radji


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