Intro Story / Hunter

Intro Story — Hunter


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Critiques & Comments
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Puzzlething
Artist
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457 comments
# 13   Posted: Feb 13 2015, 08:58 PM
  Hey dude, welcome to Void! New people are the best!


       Your rendering is incredibly clean and polished, you've got alot of control over it. You seem to have a good sense of your character's form and how to light it. I think your rendering is a little samey though, when it comes to texture. You have a lovely, soft touch to your rendering, but not everything should be soft and smooth. Both your linework and your rendering suggest that everything in your comics is made of a similar material. You should totes play around with lending a different feel to every material and texture. Rough and chunky things are fun to draw too!

       Also, remember to use atmospheric perspective when you're doing a distance shot like the cityscape on page 3, it's  super easy way to heighten the feeling of depth.

        Again, you're coming in with an incredibly polished style dude, I can't wait to see your first battle. The deadline can be rough when you want to make everything perfect, but I'm sure you'll do well!

jba1987
Artist
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42 comments
# 12   Posted: Feb 11 2015, 06:57 AM
Woahnow! There isn't much left to say; though I think Duel was on to something regarding the lines-- they seem a bit more full and fitting on the first page than the rest.

So good! And your wing-skills are hell on point!

William_Duel
Community Manager
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885 comments
# 11   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 11:01 PM
This is my first time encountering your work so I don't have any reference for your previous attempt.  So you'll have to forgive me if I'm repeating things that may have already been mentioned.  Anyways, the biggest problem I see here is how thin your linework is.  It's so thin that it's easily overpowered by every other aspect of the comic.  The word balloons especially are unnecessarily thick with their outlines.  Why did you feel the need to make the outlines that thick?

I'm not great when it comes to colors but in my opinion the colors and lighting cause things to come across a bit flat.  Rely less on glow effects.  But I also think that's because of the linework.  I think if you add some contrast and darker shadows things will definitely pop out more.

Your character looks pretty short so I had to look up his profile which claims he's 6'0.  Keep proportions in mind as you draw him.  You suffer from a bit of long face syndrome which is a common and overcome with practice.  Because the face is long the rest of the body is not in proportion so he comes off as overall a much shorter person.  

As you continue to draw comics try to push the level of detail and complexity in your backgrounds.  Everyone struggles with backgrounds.  Things look a little too boxy so it might help you to work from references.  References are an artist's best friend so be sure to use them.  

Otherwise this is excellent for an intro comic and I hope to see more from you.

Stormcrow
Artist
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58 comments
# 10   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 03:10 PM
Oh man Shen, we could fight with whoever you want! Lilyfeather is totally cool too (and she has zombies!!) so it's completely up to you!

Thanks Bent, the encouragement is really kind of you! And oh god, yes, first battle is going to have to be a long battle. I spend an average of 4-6 hours in transit every day just to get me to and from school, so by the time I get home it's hard to do anything but homework and then fall asleep. It's gonna be a mad dash on the weekends, and ten pages is going to be much more intimidating after only having to do four for the warmup XD
Cityscape practice definitely sounds like it's gonna be a good investment, and I go right through a big city each day so no excuse not to! Plus, then I'll have the studies as reference material for bkgs later. I'll do my best, everyone on here is so talented that I really want to push to try and measure up!

The Bent One
Artist
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562 comments
# 9   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 02:23 PM
Stormcrow: don't want to get kneecapped by Wei's very angry panda icon XD
Quote

You really don't. I bare the mark of shame myself.

But seriously, never get too down from criticism. It's awesome to see someone who's got this level of skill coming to Void. I can't wait to see your first battle if this is what your intro looks like. Just be sure to do a 3 week or 4 week battle for your first one, you'll want the time (trust me). Also, I'd recommend getting some cityscape references and building images and practice some architecture drawing. Perspective grids are your friend.

(ALSO WE MUST BATTLE)

Shen
Global Moderator
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1217 comments
# 8   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 02:18 PM
I was gonna fight you with Lilyfeather but then i read Hunter's bio and yeah... yeah it's gotta be Gray XD (haha we changed all our names in hype for the tournament and made everything all stupid for the new guys ^^; lol sorry!)

Stormcrow
Artist
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58 comments
# 7   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 02:11 PM
I'd totally like to fight you, Shen, as scary as it is (I've been trying to practice drawing Gray and spying on her past fights, haha)!

Thank you so much, Spoon, Shen, and Wei. I'll try and keep working on everything and improving; don't want to get kneecapped by Wei's very angry panda icon XD

Kozispoon
Approval Committee
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940 comments
# 6   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 01:04 PM
Stormcrow: Oh shit, does this mean I made it?!! Thanks so much guys, I can't wait (despite being a little terrified) to get to fight with you all!
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I nominate first fight with Gray. :D Grats on gettin' in!

Shen
Global Moderator
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1217 comments
# 5   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 12:22 PM
You made it! awesome! dibs on your first fight! XD (and those building look so much better! glad you take criticism well!)

Wei Ingnan
Artist
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597 comments
# 4   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 10:28 AM
you've already displayed a stronger aptitude and desire....and an even better attitude......don't let that change or be changed and you will do great and get a lot outta this place

Stormcrow
Artist
icon
58 comments
# 3   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 09:38 AM
Oh shit, does this mean I made it?!! Thanks so much guys, I can't wait (despite being a little terrified) to get to fight with you all!

Julz
Artist
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337 comments
# 2   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 08:55 AM
They look waaayyy better, I'm eager to battle you as well. Keep it up!!!

Gregly
Artist
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119 comments
# 1   Posted: Feb 8 2015, 08:30 AM
Sweet, you made it in! Good work on fixing the buildings too. Excited to see more!

Comic Details -

 
Ended: Feb 15th, 2015
Votes Cast: 23
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