Invitational Tournament 2012: Round 2 / The Emberhearts' vs. Johnny Patch

Invitational Tournament 2012: Round 2 — The Emberhearts' vs. Johnny Patch

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for The Emberhearts'52.8%
749 points
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Crit level: No preference


This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for Johnny Patch47.2%
670 points
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Crit level: No preference




Critiques & Comments
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Kuro
Artist
581 comments
# 14   Posted: Apr 29 2012, 07:37 PM
I think the two of these were ok, but needed better consistency.

Albino, I felt yours was all over the place. So things seemed nicely rendered & others were sloppy sketches. Like the bottom panel on page three. One building looks like it was drawn, another looks like it's line art, & another's just gradients. Overall, it's hard to get invested in when it changes panel to panel or sometimes in the same panel.
Also, a lot of the layouts seemed too decompressed. I think the same story could've been told in fewer panels & helped with the quality over quantity thing. Try to rethink showing some kind of action that plays out over the same background in more than two panels.  It's okay for an effect every now & then but it seemed to happen a lot over the course of your story.

Also, internet meme jokes always take me out of comics. But not as much as comic sans. Please, be a pal. Never ever touch comic sans ever again. Ever. And keep your choices simple. Too many different fonts over the course of one story can be distracting.

Jetster, I liked the layout of the second page. But give the balloon's placement thought too. The robot's dialogue cut off the nice bit of motion you had going on with the fall & the catch. Also, I like world's better fleshed out & there seemed to be much more love given to the characters than the world they inhabit. The subdued palette worked, but it just seemed more rushed.

TINMAN
Artist
140 comments
# 13   Posted: Apr 28 2012, 11:07 AM
Albino: Again you deliver a delightful little premise with hilarious little barbs and sketchy critters throughout. I love your utilization of the past fighter history but you don't put enough emphasis on J Patch as you should. You did however create a nice sense on continuity and connectivity with the rest of the Void World- which is a key tenant of mine- so props. You animations and sense of filmic shots are superb- clearly a great mind at work which makes your faults more evident in comparison.

The inconstancies of line, tones and quality are all that hurt you and I think its due to your ambitious page count. Some backgrounds are lovingly rendered while others are given zero care. Some goes for each panel- it varies wildly and not in any fashion. I suspect you assemble your page from separate panels rather than creating a flow or total composition and I think that shows.

Jetster: Aw I love your splotchy blocks of color and the graffing bombed out walls you've got going- such a marvelous sense of place and environment you established. Too bad Jonny gets lots in it due to the color palette and some unclear angles for his attack. The ambitiously adventurous panel breaking punch and catch page is delightful. Suits your humor and style, I applaud this. You've got such a wicked style and cool character in Johnny that I hate to see you ran out of time by the last page- tighten up your lines some and work on some better shot angles and you'll be aces.

Jetty Jay
Artist
151 comments
# 12   Posted: Apr 27 2012, 10:35 PM
Jinbee, I got no idea what you're on about but bias away hahaha

Thank you everyone so much for the feedback, I'm glad especially that the colours were well appreciated, and that people noticed that I went to another level :) I'm so happy that people like Johnny, and seeing as I'm not hopeful of getting through, I look forward to do more battles with him here!

Jinbee
Artist
7 comments
# 11   Posted: Apr 27 2012, 05:33 PM
jester-sorry.:'D

Jinbee
Artist
7 comments
# 10   Posted: Apr 27 2012, 05:33 PM
I'M SORRY I'M TOTALLY BIASED NOW.:'D

William_Duel
Community Manager
943 comments
# 9   Posted: Apr 26 2012, 10:02 PM
I've enjoyed the Emberheart comics because you've been very ambitious
given your time limitations and I've enjoyed the humorous tone.  I
also applaud your attempts to bring other characters into your
continuity, which serves to make the world feel more populated.  Your
style is very defined and that's great but there's also a lot of
things here that don't mesh well together.  The first thing I will
attack here is the font you use for much of it.  Remember that there
are always sites online that you can use like Blambot and you can
experiment with different fonts to see how well they stand against
your art.  The font you use here in several instances serves only to
detract from your art.  The biggest flaws I see in this comic are on
page 3, because we get a real mix of everything.  I see textures, I
see digital effects of all sorts, all intermingled with your art.
This is just a bit jarring because it serves to contrast from
everything else.  I won't blame you for the linework, because you've
done so much in so short a time but I really hope to see tighter work
from you in the future when you're not restricted to the one week
slot.  The story is really amusing and I hope you keep the apartment
setting as it can serve as a memorable and hilarious void landmark.

Jetster, Johnny is pretty awesome.  This was another fun story to
read.  The way you filled the space and the background was terrific.
I didn't think it was too obstrusive though it could have used more
shading and more differentiation between foreground and background
insofar as coloring.  The color palette was great by my standards and
everything was pretty clear.  I would just say to tighten up the
lineart and work on perspective and setting in the future.

Keep up the great work you guys.

Animeshen
Artist
1490 comments
# 8   Posted: Apr 26 2012, 01:12 AM
I am not completely sure what happened in either of these but they made me lol.

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 7   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 09:59 PM
Albino Turtle-You have a really good eye for shots and did a great job on the expressions. I felt like the story jumped around slightly towards the end which felt a little jarring, but for the most part I enjoyed it.

Jetster-your style is a lot of fun and I'm sure I said this last round, but I still like the color palette you've chosen here. When time allows it, you should try to slow down on the backgrounds just a bit. The looseness works well for the characters, but just tightening the background up a little would help. (definitely don't go for super straight technical lines or anything as it would look jarring against your stuff)

Con
Artist
92 comments
# 6   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 04:34 PM
Albino, your command of facial expressions is awesome. You have a wide range of angles and everything too, and arn't afraid to get into the backgrounds and even incorporate them into your story which is also awesome. I really enjoyed this comic, but I think quality-wise the comic previous to this one might have been stronger. A week is a short time to crank it out though, so I definately understand.

Jetster,  I really like your character and hope to see some more of him in the future. I thought this was a big improvement over the comic you made just two weeks ago, definately! But the pacing is a bit odd, and the conflict is very short leaving very little room for interactions. That being said, I think you took a lot of things to the next level from the last round so I salute your hard work and urge you to keep going!

slothvert
Artist
71 comments
# 5   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 02:03 PM
Albino: I little confusing, and very unfinished looking. I would have like quality over quantity, and your Quality score definitely took a hit from the number of things that simply weren't drawn. All in all it just seemed rushed, which is a little disappointing, because I know you can do better.

Jetster: I can see you're still having some difficulty with perspective and keeping your characters fluid, but I really admire that you're not afraid to try and draw anything. I like the little details, too, like the wall mural. Keep it up, man - I know you're getting better!

Gregly
Artist
201 comments
# 4   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 12:52 PM
That face on the first page... hilarious.

SPROJLER
Artist
12 comments
# 3   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 11:52 AM
hahaahah! this was great!

AxeLord
Artist
30 comments
# 2   Posted: Apr 17 2012, 06:43 AM
It's always interesting to see how match ups like this turn out. But I think it truly tests the writing abilities. I can't wait to see what you both bring to the table :3

Good Luck.

Jetty Jay
Artist
151 comments
# 1   Posted: Apr 17 2012, 05:37 AM
Haha, I don't know that I'm going to stand a chance, but I'm looking forward to doing this anyway! It'll be fun going against you !

Comic Details -

 
Tournament Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Apr 29th, 2012
Votes Cast: 38
Page Views: 1674
Winner: Albino Turtle
 

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