Lophii Formes vs. Sebastian Rockwell

Lophii Formes vs. Sebastian Rockwell

by Fearn


429 points
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by


251 points
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Critiques & Comments
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William_Duel
Community Manager
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885 comments
# 7   Posted: Mar 6 2010, 05:36 PM
fern, it's great to see you experimenting and chugging along.  And while I'm not against loose/sketchy styles, I feel that the problem here is that it's too even.  Since everything is drawn in more or less the same way the eye isn't really drawn to the right places.  The white stroke around the characters was a good attempt at bringing them out but again, since there's always white present it doesn't quite achieve the required effect.   One suggestion I could possibly make, with the thought of line variation (because this could use some more of that), is to make the background lines thinner as they approach the characters.  It's just a thought and I'm not totally sure how effective it would be.  Maybe less shadowing, on the faces especially would be good too, since it's like they have a strong light shining down on them at all times.  While the story is short and sweet, I enjoyed it and I think you played well with the fact that they both have teleportation powers.  Very cool.

Twilight, this looked like the start of something good.  Better luck next time.

Fearn
Artist
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343 comments
# 6   Posted: Mar 1 2010, 06:38 AM
seeker: it's okay, it happened to me before. Shame you didn't finish, begins fabulously and I hope you will actually complete it sometime cos I'd love to read the whole thing...

RabbitRabbit: I'm glad :) That's like the only funny thing in there lol

Base: I usually first write script and then plan pages, so no, I didn't just write it out as I went along. I'm not superhappy with the story, but I thought I will run out of time if I faff for too long with it. I suppose it would have been difficult to follow if you didn't know the characters background, but otherwise I am not sure what the problem could be - if you don't mind further explanation.

Base
Artist
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56 comments
# 5   Posted: Feb 27 2010, 11:07 PM
Fern: Congrats on finishing on time! But I noticed a few things. First of all, the story was really haphazard-- it was difficult to tell what was going on. If it weren't for the dialogue, I'd have no idea what was happening from panel to panel and page to page. Did you kind of just write it out as you went a long? Planning the angles and deciding where you want to place your characters in the frame will go a long way for you, I think. Good stuff though, I laughed at that picture too lol. Keep up the hard work!

Seeker: It happens, I don't think it's a big deal for one or two battles so long as you don't make a habit of it. What you had seemed pretty solid, and at least now you have an idea of how long this takes for you now as well.

rabbitrabbit
Artist
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334 comments
# 4   Posted: Feb 27 2010, 09:44 PM
I have to say, I hit the floor laughing when he revealed his fiancee's picture, Fern.  XD  

Fearn
Artist
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343 comments
# 3   Posted: Feb 18 2010, 05:48 AM
UPLOADED!
For the first time in my life I finished something few days before the deadline! I am sure proud, especially after the previous failure. Although it ends with a bit of an anticlimax, I can't think of anything else...

Mister Kent
Artist
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938 comments
# 2   Posted: Feb 16 2010, 05:38 AM
Can't WAIT!

DrasticFantastic
Artist
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165 comments
# 1   Posted: Jan 23 2010, 11:59 PM
Portal Battle.

 'Nuff said.

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 4 weeks
Ended: Mar 6th, 2010
Votes Cast: 21
Page Views: 740
Winner: Fearn

 

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