Speed Death Tournament 2008: Round 1 / David vs. Sebi The Immortal

Speed Death Tournament 2008: Round 1 — David vs. Sebi The Immortal

1729 points
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by Monday

1587 points
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Critiques & Comments
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1 comment
# 17   Posted: May 6 2008, 08:03 AM
hey dark night you got a fukin sick character. i,d like to see his ass in action again. keep up the works.

# 16   Posted: Apr 28 2008, 06:37 PM
Damn! great fight!
TheOne got my vote because I was more entertained by the story, and the characters both had a little time to shine and felt alive. You design your action shots well.  Monday your art was better, but I wasn\'t as satisfied, the character\'s actions were less dynamic (except page 6).

# 15   Posted: Apr 28 2008, 01:27 PM
DK: cooooollll. D: Even though the lines were rushed, I could always tell what was happening. And.. it was good happenings.
I disagree a little bit with Angie in that I don\'t think the purple itself hurt... I thought it fit nicely with the bright yellows and reds... I think it was the fact that it was surrounded by white made it distracting.. I mean, all the other bright colors are filling in areas surrounded by black... so I\'m thinking that maybe if you had filled the monster\'s whole mouth with purple, it would have worked better.

Mr Monday: I think this was a good introduction to the character. David seemed a little one-dimensional though.. but I like how you drew him. I suggest taking more time on the text in the future, because it seems sorta rushed here. Squishing into bubbles in some places. the last page is the best.

These two were a lot of fun. I wish you could both go on.

Mister Kent
# 14   Posted: Apr 23 2008, 09:01 PM
ODK - I liked your backgrounds - I think your comic had better scenery. I also liked that there was some good stuff going on expression-wise. Your characters didn\'t feel stiff, and were animated. Good work

Monday - The action scenes were kool - love that shot of Sebi all crazy upside down. Background details would have helped create a proper setting - after a while it was hard to connect the characters to their place in the scene.

# 13   Posted: Apr 23 2008, 09:09 AM
YEAYEA great comic Knight, you had some really fun shots in there. Monmon you\'re always a winner to me, you have such cool ideas and junk HMPH WAY COOL BOYS.

# 12   Posted: Apr 22 2008, 08:51 PM
Dark Knight - Awesome comic!! Your pacing, angles, drawings, are great! Very dramatic and exciting. What I enjoy the most is you pack so much in one page, without much details or getting that lost or confused. You have a future in this, however you\'ll need to start doing some clean up work. Some lines / characters are a little too sketchy. Good battle!!!

Monday - Cool comic. Although, you add way too much negative space in some parts. Sometimes it\'s like your characters are standing around in a sea of white. Slow down and take care of your drawings, the super fast sketching looses me very quickly! Your best pages and work comes out when it looks like you were thinking ahead (end of page 5 to page 6)

# 11   Posted: Apr 22 2008, 07:26 PM
Man, awesome showing, Knight!

David: The art was messy, but I got what was going on and the quality didn\'t distract me or anything. The comic was enjoyable, and I\'d disagree with Phill that it was a typical meet-fight-kill. The thing that sets generic fights from the great ones is character development. In this, David had great development, but Sebi\'s was a bit lacking. Still, Sebi\'s portrayal was amusing. I\'ll echo everyone\'s art critiques. I don\'t mind lower quality (these are one weekers, after all), but clarity is important. Keep up with character development and good storytelling and you\'ll do great!

Monday: You seem to have poor luck with special matches, haha. I\'m also beginning to think everyone on this site is easily confused, I thought this was perfectly coherent. One thing I\'d point out, though, is while Sebi was fleshed out and had a lot of personality, but David was a caricature of his former self. He didn\'t even really seem like the same character, and I didn\'t give half a piss about him dying. Especially since he got wtfpwned. Also, I\'m loving that you\'ve been stepping out of your safety zones for XXO, N0C, and  Sebi, but why the Black cameo? I figured a new, intriguing SDT referee would\'ve worked better. It may just be me, but it irked me a little

All in all though, I enjoyed both battles! Yeesh, so many fighters felled in the first round.

# 10   Posted: Apr 22 2008, 04:41 PM
Now this is one of the top matches I\'ve seen here.

TODK: Welcome to void mang! So far this has been a pretty good first battle for ya, the art greatly reminds me of what James does here but with a slight mix of anime influence to ya. Really great stuff here dude, just wish you hadn\'t of rushed this fight however, next time when dealing with limited days for completing a fight: Try to do a story with fewer pages. It\'s a bit more difficult to tell a story without going near the double digits, but believe me: It\'ll help you in the end and it\'s a good way to prevent rushed entries in the future.

I really enjoyed this story now, I did have my gripe which I\'m having with almost everybody here so far (Meet, fight, and kill story), but the dialogue really seemed to stand out on this and make this fight pretty entertaining. But anywho, so far so good on void dude. Just keep this up alright?

Monday: Dude, why so much negative space in the beginning? You jerk! Anywho, pretty nice comic man, the dialogue is looking a lot better man! The story here... well I\'m pretty sure most people know what I\'m going to gripe about right now, but it was kinda confusing around the middle for me. Did Sebi kill all of those people, or did Dave? Well, on the plus side I liked how you picked things up in the later half of your story, just wish you put in a little more at the beginning.

Really great stuff guys, but I\'m going with the new guy.

Aluísio C. Santos
# 9   Posted: Apr 22 2008, 03:01 PM
Continuuns of reality and virtuality collide here!

TODK: Great first battle here man! I like that you actually draw backgrounds, and while there is this messiness all around, its also kinda detailed! Apparetly yous is the only one showing a development on the fight (like, showing the past, maybe). The action shots are very cool, and so is the dialogues.. I don\'t remember of a real problem, except for that you could try get more precise, maybe, dunno, that part is really stilistical, so dont mind me

Mondeh: I dunno if its just me, but I enjoy a lot your digital inking! I liked a lot of the \"twists\" like, he being suddenly shot by Black, and also the action shots very creative. I could realize what was Sebi\'s motion with no problems. The part where everyone is dead there is a bit confusing, sometimes it leads the reader to think it was David who killed everyone, then, that it was Sebi.

Good luck for ya\'ll

# 8   Posted: Apr 22 2008, 11:49 AM
Thank you Dark, this was a decent first showing from you.

The One Dark Knight
# 7   Posted: Apr 22 2008, 10:17 AM
Cheers Angie, I had to rush this so my lines and coloring was really rushed... not to mention that I\'m horribly inexperienced with both. Thanks for the crit though.

And nice battle Monday.

# 6   Posted: Apr 22 2008, 10:05 AM
The One Dark Knight-I hope you intend on sticking around on Void whether you survive this tournament or not, because I really enjoyed your style. Cleaning up your lineart would have helped you loads I think. It was just a shame seeing stray pencil lines hiding under those colors. You have a nice design sense and I thought your backgrounds were nice and unique. Be careful with consistency though, Sebi seemed to change quite a bit throughout the duration of the battle, it seemed you especially had difficulties with profile views. Be careful with some of your color choices as well, the extreme saturated purple and such kind of killed the color palette you had going. Please stick around on Void!

Monday-As usual, the quality and the style of your battle was very nice. Your anatomy however is still having some issues. These guys had some really large heads for their tiny bodies. I really felt that you could have pushed your art further, it would have also been awesome to see your interpretation of David\'s abilities. I had no idea what was going on in this, but I\'ve long given up on being able to understand your battles haha but I did try, I really did. Slowing down when you\'re writing the text might help just a little. I think it\'s mostly your pacing that confuses me though, you tend to jump around quite a bit and I lose sight of what it is I\'m reading.

# 5   Posted: Apr 21 2008, 08:02 PM
OH god OH god Almost done and I just got out of class D::::

# 4   Posted: Apr 14 2008, 07:49 PM
mhm mhm thats riiiight oh yeeea

Aluísio C. Santos
# 3   Posted: Apr 14 2008, 06:41 PM
I want a piece of one of you two as well!

# 2   Posted: Apr 14 2008, 06:31 PM
Now this seems interesting! Good luck you two~ xD

# 1   Posted: Apr 14 2008, 06:13 PM
Can\'t wait to see what you two do! Don\'t do too many pages Monday

Comic Details -

Type: Speed Death Tournament Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Apr 28th, 2008
Votes Cast: 63
Page Views: 2634
Winner: The One Dark Knight


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