Robert vs. Pothole

Robert vs. Pothole


1211 points
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1168 points
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Critiques & Comments
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Voodoo
Artist
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18 comments
# 41   Posted: Mar 21 2008, 05:32 PM
Wow. Regretfully i havent been to Void in a long while but this was the first battle I\'ve looked at in over a year and I\'m seriously amazed to have jumped right into one of the best battles I\'ve ever seen here. Both Entries were amazing but If I read these before voting was over I probably would have given it to Pothole but not by much. Great Job guys!

Airlight
Artist
icon
136 comments
# 40   Posted: Mar 11 2008, 09:55 PM
I\'m super late, to get back to addressing everybody\'s comments. But. I did read them all. I don\'t want to seem like I skimped out like a coward to reply. So. Better late than never I guess.

Back to Z - , thanks for your crits, man! I will keep in mind all the mentioned stuff for the future with the unrealistic bits in my coloring as well as refining my work more. Quality over quantity works for me. I\'m glad that you thought the pages were nice, and a battle in the future either with  would be awesome.

Dimension - Thanks! I am glad to hear you enjoyed the story and such, and cameo. As mentioned before I will pay attention more to my line art.

Kuro - Speedpainting, well. yeah, another one of my concerns with this comic was that I might have made it a little superfluous, and I guess you nailed it on the head. The thumbnail plan was strictly 9 pages and it was difficult to decide what story details to drop out for me since nothing seemed to work without another detail and vice versa -  not to mention, it was hard to break my focus from just getting the whole thing done under so little time, or what I should revise to make the reading less.. overworked, as mentioned. Storytelling is another thing I would like to improve on, so thanks for your pointers. I won\'t try to rush everything, even though I only actually rushed the last few pages. Appreciate the crit, thank you.

Dragon-dan - Glad you digged the thumbs, haha! and it\'s okay if you can\'t think of a crit, thanks for the comment.

Spanex - Did it surprise you that much? Haha, I kind of felt like putting a few cameos in, for fun. Glad you liked it! You\'re not a noob. Thanks for commenting!

Johnparks - Hahaha, interesting observations from your part. I\'ll have to sharpen my detail on my BG so it doesn\'t confuse anyone in the future! But hey I\'m glad you liked it enough to read again -- I guess by just getting out of the sewers he solved the first problem that he got into at the beginning.. which is him accidentally dropping into the sewers.. He is capable of quickly getting into a building and getting away from the shark from that point, I suppose. Thanks for the feedback!

Phillip C - Well. May I remind you this was a 1 week battle. I know I should not be making any excuses, but in my defense it was hard enough completing the whole thing on its own with colors to make this look relatively solid, not to mention real life + school things that I won\'t bring up because everyone has life to tend to. An extra week would render me able to go back and add more substance to my lackluster BGs and perhaps stabilize the plot and remove extra unnecessary stuff. Though I will do my best to do the things you pointed out though, and glad you digged the coloring -- thank you.

Squidman - I\'m glad you like my style! But I love color, I might not skip it entirely for my next battle, because my B+W work cannot get stronger overnight to the extent where I\'m confident enough to leave it out on its own (though I am working on it as people are reading this reply.) But I will strengthen it, surely enough. I will also look at my gutter thickness! Glad you dig the cameo as well though, thanks!

Pheww. Yeah. Critiques and feedback are good, thanks for putting the effort in all your words, everyone.

Aluísio C. Santos
Artist
icon
735 comments
# 39   Posted: Feb 29 2008, 05:23 AM
Thanks for the critiques and compliments, guys! They sure help!

I\'ll try to work better on the blacks, Though I still think I\'ll them on faces, ahha, but I\'ll try to figure a way in which it doesn\'t get in the way, hmmm.

About the cop siren, nothing really happened, it\'s kind of Robert was asking himself where would the cops be, since Pothole was wrecking havoc and noone was doing anything to stop it, and the reason could/would be that the police itself was swallowed already by it, so Robert decides do go after him, after seeing the cop sirens, hehe, I don\'t know if that makes sense. At all!

Thanks!!

squid
Artist
icon
421 comments
# 38   Posted: Feb 28 2008, 08:38 PM
airface: Good show :> Your style has a lot of energy in it, which I find very exciting.
Consider skipping the color for your next battle. That will keep you from going too crazy with color, and focusing on linework.
I\'m not so sure the gutters have to be as big as they are. Maybe play around with different widths and styles.
Hope this helps.
Also, thanks for the cameo XDD

Z: Pure. Eye candy. The colors are just delicious and totally set the mood. I think the heavy black shadows in the inks may have been working against them, however.
I kinda tripped up story-wise in at least one place.. like the cop car that came out of nowhere. I still can\'t tell whether it landed on Rob or someone else? Maybe some big panels showing where the action is coming from would help.
I hope that helps you. I am looking foreward to more battles from both these characters.

Phill
Artist
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895 comments
# 37   Posted: Feb 23 2008, 02:44 PM
Impressive coloring from the both of you

Airlight: I must say, you really know your stuff when it comes to digital painting. However... looking past all of that, that really seems to be the only thing that really pops out in your pages, it\'s not sloppy, but there\'s hardly any details and all of the coloring is covering it up. The coloring is mighty impressive mind you, but to me it looks like you\'re taking as many short cuts as you can with this comic so you can focus more on painting. Give us some details dude, a sewer in void would be more than just a tunnel, it\'d have hobos living inside, rats, broken pipes, toxic waste drums, etc... you don\'t need to go overboard with the coloring either, even the simplest coloring job will look great if the background and line work has just as much effort put into it just as you put into the digital stuff.

I wasn\'t too impressed with the story either now, had this of been a 4 or 5 page comic this kind of thing would work, but this story seems to be a bit too stretched out for my tastes.


Zsaber: Wonderfully done 1 weeker dude, I\'m... kinda not a fan of the blacks on places like the face of Robert and such, but overall I liked the consistency of the backgrounds and characters. Story was pretty good as well, I\'m also gonna disagree with John here as it\'s kind of a bit too cliche to just \"Run from the big monster\", and I thought him confronting it was pretty cool and showed that this character wasn\'t somebody who just runs at every strange thing he sees.



Overall, I really did like Air\'s coloring job, but I really think this one should go to Z for his consistent quality.

johnparks
Artist
icon
43 comments
# 36   Posted: Feb 23 2008, 10:11 AM
Airlight- I loved the work on this piece… great job. A couple very minor points… The first panel on page one, on my first read through I thought he was in a studio apartment walking up to his window… with the shark outside. It wasn’t clear that he was on the street passing a storefront with multiple TVs… The reason for this was that the individual TVs ended up looking like the frame of a window, rather then well TVs. One the second pass it was clear that it’s the side walk… But just pointing it out cause it caused some confusion on my first read through.

Everything else up to the last panel was great.. I ended up going back and reading over the story simply because I enjoyed it that much!

The last page is a little anti-climatic, it’s not clear why the fight would end, just because Robert made it to the surface? According to my reading of the landshark’s background it shouldn’t have any problem continuing the chase… in fact the best why for Robert to get away would be to go for higher ground… like the top of a building… since the landshark is afraid of hights…


Zasabreuser- Again I really enjoyed your entry… I love the intro with the hair cut gone wrong! Put a big smile on my face. But I did feel that the conversation between Robert and the Shark felt out of place… Yeah I get that everyone in Void is use to weird stuff, but a 25’ shark is something almost everyone will run from… or at least not take the time to talk too… Other then that I thought it was a very strong entry and really enjoyed it.

Spanex
Artist
icon
11 comments
# 35   Posted: Feb 23 2008, 09:09 AM
Eeep, I didn\'t think Char would be seen in your comic Airlight. That had me like a \"sholy shit\" kick, even if he was only in one panel. Aaanyways, I like the story. I loved the expressions. But me being a total noob I don\'t see anything bad about it.

And for Zsa, I love the details and cut out shading, but I\'m just a little dissapointed about the story, thought I loved the part where the ear of the customer was cut off.

dragon-dan
Artist
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61 comments
# 34   Posted: Feb 23 2008, 01:31 AM
GREAT joke with the thumbnails.  This tourney has got to have the highest number of crashers ever :P
Airlight:Good story, I actually am drawing a blank on specific crit, so you get the standard thumbs up!  Mostly because I knwo nothign about digital coloring. >.>

Zsabeuser: I\'m sure you\'re going to hear a lot about your unique art here, and it\'s true.  You put a lot of detail into things, and stuff like the shadows full of cracks is so abstract, just fascinating to look at.

Kuro
Artist
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581 comments
# 33   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 09:15 PM
great for the length of time guys!

zsabre\'s got my vote. i enjoyed it alot. and i loved the street sharks back in the day so... you know. holla haha. seriously though, no real crits other than the guy who\'s hair he was cutting & robert looked kinda similar. good work with the english, nothing that confused me i knew what you were going for. my only complaint might be it was too short haha. but then again too yeah. it was only a week.

airlight, i gotta tell you man, i realize you\'re all about the speedpainting & Yes, this was a week long battle. but slow down! not everything\'s about speed! speedpainting is essentially like sketching. it\'s fine for a thumbnail, but not the final comic. do something you can finalize, not whip out in an hour. i mean for instance, there\'s a bunch of panels of robert riding pothole in the sewers in the middle. you could have told that same story in half the panels with more attention focused on the quality. because of that, pacing wise it seemed to drag a bit in there. but yeah. spend your time better. optimize for quality over quantity.

good reads though. can\'t wait to see more.... or kick yo\' butts... which ever.... haha

-J

Dimension
Artist
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489 comments
# 32   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 08:20 PM
@AirLight: Awesome job! I think the colors were very nice and vibrant and to have done that many pages in one week is really impressive. As Shortfury said though: work on your lines :3 I still think you did a great job over all so well done! I thought the story was pretty entertaining too.
P.S. I like how you drew Eden and Seak in there X3

@Zsabreuser: LOL! The ending made me laugh, haha XD Great work on every thing dude :3 I liked your inking and cell shading, keep up the sweet work :)

Aluísio C. Santos
Artist
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735 comments
# 31   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 04:50 PM
That\'s some rocking action, Light!
I think your pages are pretty nice for a 9 pager in 1 week, being all coloured, and everything finished, though you could\'ve opted for a lesser page amount and spend more time refining the art, or in better line work.
Concerning the art, I think your panelling is a lot better than the intro, really better, and it\'s easier to read. As for the colouring, while I kind of know that it\'s your style, they are a bit too shiny, even for a sewer, i guess (acid like water?), and you might want to make it a darker place in the future, maybe (i mean, think about the lightsources more). But overall it\'s pretty decent!
I\'m glad you liked my side, and I hope we can fight sometime in the future!

About the ear cut, I must let you know that my father is a hairdresser himself, and he has more years of experience than Robert\'s lifetime and he still manages to cut his own finger even nowadays, so I thought it would be interesting if a super agile person accidently lost a slightly amount of precision and made an error I guess. (though I admit part of the ear is exagerating haha, but that\'s just my taste)

Kotori: I\'ve been trying my best but looks like I\'m not succeeding. I tried making Robert speak more like a normal person. I promise (as I always do :P) to read more english stuff (and possibly non-void battles?)
And as for Sweeney Todd, I\'m eager for that movie to air, really, Jhonny Depp is such a fine actor!

Thanks for all the crits and compliments! My dead pens smile in glee! :D

Airlight
Artist
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136 comments
# 30   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 04:31 PM
Thank you everybooddyddyy so far. I\'m not sure what went on with page order because I discreetly remembered uploading in the right order. .but next time I\'ll simplify the filenames of my pages and confusion should be cleared up!

Frankly I can\'t stand to look at Airlight\'s fight but.. anyways.. *shot*

Sabre, your entry. I\'ve already told you this before over MSN. it was superb. I really enjoyed your side, because it was fluid and smooth and your lineart! and colors stand very strong against mine. Robert was slightly OOC with the ear cuttin\' bit though, but the way you made him OOC was hilarious and it made me laugh --  so that was okay. Your story and impact was also short and effective, and coupled with the unique style and detail level of your art, it was overall a great read with your funky dialogue (it had this certain native oomph to it.. it\'s interesting to read. You might want to check back at grammar errors though ~). Thanks so much for this battle. I\'m honored to have my first fight with someone very talented and experienced in art.

Kotori-Ky - Thanks! I\'m pleased to hear I didn\'t disappoint for my first fight. For the comment on Z\'s comic.. I\'m guessing you\'re referring to Sweeney Todd? Yeah.. that part reminded me of the movie too.. ahahaha.

Kozispoon - Most of my worries revolved around panel flow for mine. I\'m glad it worked out well for you. Thanks muchly for your encouraging comments!

Shortfury - I\'ll definitely focus on my lines. They\'ve always been my major weakness with my work. I have been studying up on anatomy and figures all this time, though I\'ll continue doing them more and more. I\'ll just have to switch to traditional ink since digital inkwork doesn\'t seem to get me far unless I was spending alot of time on it (1 week battle is short.. so..). I\'ll have my next battle be traditional.. and improve from what I\'ve got here.
One thing though.. there was a part that indicated how he got into the sewers in the first place. but I guess the out of order pages didn\'t help, and it could be my own fault for not naming the pages clearly. I did show alot of people behind the scenes for additional criticisms, however and they didn\'t really naysay much about the story so I kept it how it is for the most part.
I\'m sorry if the story wasn\'t clear enough in the end, but thank you for all your criticisms, Shortfury. I\'ll pay attention to what I tend to be less strong at, and get to work with my linework. I\'ll also be more rigid when it comes to painting structural backgrounds, as well.  

Marley
Artist
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259 comments
# 29   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 03:32 PM
Zsa\'s comic is clearly superior in both quality and entertainment and his pacing is dead on. His comic is a good example of how you don\'t have to do 10 + pages to tell an effective story. He also did a good job of developing Robert\'s character. Nice linework and nice colors. The only panel I found confusing was the police light on the ground, since there was really nothing to establish where it came from. Thats all though! Great job and page 4 is insanity!

For a first fight Airlight I can\'t say that you were terrible. Its not bad, and you did much better than most do on their first fight, but there are a whole lot of problems with your comic. I think the number one reason why I find your comic so irritating is the overworked digital coloring. There\'s nothing in the line work that backs up the colors, and I\'m really a stickler for line work. You shouldn\'t have to mask your problems with colors and texture fills. Take some time to study some anatomy books, and fill some sketchbooks full of figure studies. Do some background studies while you\'re at it. All I can see background wise in the lines are these lazy looking pipes and wobbly vertical lines that are supposed to be buildings. Get the line work under control! I also didn\'t really feel the story go anywhere. It was just a bunch of dodging. I mean what happened on page 10 (technically page 2)? How did he end up in the sewers? Think of your reader first when you make comics. Read it through like you\'re the reader or have friends read the comic and ask if they have any problems with the clarity. I know you will be able to improve and do better comics, so please use these suggestions and work on those lines!!

Kozispoon
Approval Committee
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940 comments
# 28   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 03:15 PM
Quality on both parts was amazing
The creativity in coloring and styles blew me away. For a weeks deadline this blew my MIND. I salute both of you and only want to try harder on my own battles after seeing this. The panel flow on Airlight\'s really went well with the sewer surfing and zsabreuser? Your page four is gorgeous.

I can\'t say the story was really all that great, but everything else was a visual treat.

Kotori Ky
Artist
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216 comments
# 27   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 03:05 PM
Airlight: I loved the pages, frankly. The style was interesting and fluid and aside from the pages being out of order, I enjoyed the read. The colors were crisp and interesting and the fonts weren\'t annoying on the eyes. I gave you higher marks in general, nice first showing.

zsa: Not bad, though the text made my hair curl a bit. I\'d suggest running it by someone to fix the grammatical errors, it hurt your scores from me, at least. And Robert seemed a bit off to me from how Airlight designed him. I didn\'t think he was the type to take an ear off. XD Though it DID make me have happy thoughts about a particular movie... hehe.

Helftan
Artist
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68 comments
# 26   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 02:46 PM
9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,10 correct order

exelent work fellas

Angie
Council
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1937 comments
# 25   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 02:39 PM
I don\'t know what happened but your pages got crazy out of order Airlight, it appears if you want to read it in order, start at page 9, go backwards, and then page 10 is really page 10. I\'ll give a real crit in a bit and hopefully this is repaired.

E.W. Schneider
Artist
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1041 comments
# 24   Posted: Feb 22 2008, 02:39 PM
. . .Something needs to be fixed in Air\'s.

Airlight
Artist
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136 comments
# 23   Posted: Feb 21 2008, 07:09 PM
Okay. I\'ve uploaded pages and sent thumbnails to Wei. hopefully it works out okay!

As for the comic.. I wish I could have done better in alot of aspects here and there, but for a week, I personally think I\'ve done alot for my first fight... There are some inconsistencies in colors and I apologize for that in advance, since it wasn\'t an easy task for me getting everything completed on time. But yeah enough of that. I\'m nervous.. ehehe.

Aluísio C. Santos
Artist
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735 comments
# 22   Posted: Feb 21 2008, 03:15 PM
Ok, all set!

Aluísio C. Santos
Artist
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735 comments
# 21   Posted: Feb 21 2008, 11:16 AM
Yeah, allight! hehe
Thanks and good luck for you too, Light, I\'m eager :OOO

Just posting to say I\'ve already uploaded the pages too.
I\'ll post again when I\'m done with the thumbs

Airlight
Artist
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136 comments
# 20   Posted: Feb 21 2008, 03:52 AM
heh I\'ve got my pages done at last :x I\'ll upload em later today though, i still have to tweak a few things and do one more thing. Good luck Zsa!

Rtv!
Artist
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603 comments
# 19   Posted: Feb 20 2008, 09:50 AM
Bring on the dayumage!

Red
Council
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632 comments
# 18   Posted: Feb 19 2008, 11:22 PM
DAYUUUUUM!!!!!!

JawsDrawings
Artist
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35 comments
# 17   Posted: Feb 19 2008, 09:51 PM
damn i cant wait for this ONE

naboooki
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2 comments
# 16   Posted: Feb 18 2008, 07:18 PM
this being the first time i have checked out this site, i have to say im a little eager to see this match. characters are interesting, and the art looks rad so far. cant wait.

alberto311
Artist
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349 comments
# 15   Posted: Feb 18 2008, 09:44 AM
Whoa! Cojones grandes!

StarBomber109
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4 comments
# 14   Posted: Feb 17 2008, 08:35 PM
Wow, battle\'s between first time fighters.  This, ought to ROCK.  I hope I can learn something here.

drawdan
Artist
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294 comments
# 13   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 03:27 PM
you gotta throw a sat. night live landshark joke in there somewhere...Knock-knock..\"Avon calling\"

Kageboushi
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10 comments
# 12   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 01:35 PM
STREET SHARKS!  STREEEEEEEEET SHARKS!!
This battle is gonna be JAWSOME


(I\'m saying that for every Pothole battle ever)

drawdan
Artist
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294 comments
# 11   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 12:35 PM
I took a look at the shark, and its a pretty unique char. for Voids lineup. I kept hearing the jaws music when I was reading the 2 page bio. Good solid work-lets see what you do with your first battle

Lucky Cypher
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31 comments
# 10   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 10:09 AM
Well this is gonna be...strange...
Seriously can\'t wait!!^^

Powerz
Artist
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107 comments
# 9   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 09:21 AM
HARDCORE

Ryuartyi
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41 comments
# 8   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 09:09 AM
Good luck guys. Can\'t wait for this to be done.

Angie
Council
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1937 comments
# 7   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 09:06 AM
haha damn, be very careful guys. There is no extensions for 1 week matches and no extensions for first timers. So don\'t disappoint!

squid
Artist
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421 comments
# 6   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 07:45 AM
Only one week?? D: Good luck!

drawdan
Artist
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294 comments
# 5   Posted: Feb 15 2008, 06:28 AM
wow..... fast battle..I always like watchin Void rookies slug it out...lets see the mayhem!!

rabbitrabbit
Artist
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334 comments
# 4   Posted: Feb 14 2008, 10:35 PM
Hot Diggety DAYUM.  

Craqued
Artist
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202 comments
# 3   Posted: Feb 14 2008, 10:17 PM
HYEEEAH

Airlight
Artist
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136 comments
# 2   Posted: Feb 14 2008, 10:14 PM
IT WON\'T HAPPEN

Aluísio C. Santos
Artist
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735 comments
# 1   Posted: Feb 14 2008, 10:13 PM
FIRST MEAL

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Feb 29th, 2008
Votes Cast: 48
Page Views: 3893
Winner: Airlight

 

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