The Tshirt made me smile.
This was a neat exchange and interaction between characters that felt like an amuse bouche. You're given us a taste and we're ready to enjoy the actual full meal that never seems to show up. I'll have to agree with the previous comments that this did indeed feel like it kind of...meandered. I was so dazzled by the mood of the colors used and wonderful art, that upon second read and critical eye I realized "Wait...did anything happen?"
And I don't think anything did. Shi and Zana are being nasty, but there's no culmination to that nastiness. Grey gets their agoraphobia glossed over, but its forgotten as quickly as its brought up and results in a last page where I'm left going "Wait..that's it?"
Improvements / Grey
Critiques & Comments
# 6
Posted:
Jul 23 2017, 12:08 PM
# 5
Posted:
Jul 21 2017, 08:43 AM
awww! Now I wanna baby Grey too, look at him drowning in that shirt! XD I love this short and sweet little insight, I cant blame any of the characters for this argument, but I hope Grey can overcome his anxieties and go outside to play. Not that i would want to either though, outside is goddam terrifying lol, every time he goes outside its awful XD Im kinda glad to see him reacting like this, it feel real. The designs in this are great, everyones are expressions and gestures really sell the emotion, though i think there was more you could do to sell the "messiness" of the room since I thought it looked pretty normal until Zana said something. I love the different relationships all three of these characters have with each other and the ways they speak to each other. This was a good insight into their daily lives! Looking forward to more of Grey!
# 4
Posted:
Jul 21 2017, 08:34 AM
I really don't understand the point of this comic, because nothing substantial actually happened. This feels like the introductory pages for a much longer comic.
# 3
Posted:
Jul 19 2017, 06:05 PM
I really enjoyed the colors and the linework. Pacing worked well and I enjoyed the interactions between characters. I really enjoyed the very first panel where he is watching the star system hologram. Overall, very well done!
# 2
Posted:
Jul 18 2017, 04:53 AM
The comic looks beautiful I think the only thing Id critique about the visuals is that shizana seems a bit off in a few poses to me. I do like what is here and it is nice to see grey in a change of clothes I hope he is getting his armor washed the poor boy must have smelt horrible by now without a wash. Though I have to say I wish grey had more agency to do what he wants out of the world. I love that grey is affected by Armageddon and I'd love to see how giant killer robots trying to destroy a city he himself dislikes affects him perhaps an aversion to AI's since the Greys as a species dont seem to use them for some reason. I like what I got I hope this story has lasting effects.
# 1
Posted:
Jul 17 2017, 01:43 PM
lol Grey is really babied by Shi ^^ Is he compensating? hmmmm.
Maybe Grey DOES need to socialize more? Would be fun to see him interact more with shizana's immediate friend circle !
Maybe Grey DOES need to socialize more? Would be fun to see him interact more with shizana's immediate friend circle !
Beyond Battle
Drawing Time:
1 week
Ended:
Jul 23rd, 2017
Votes Cast:
20
Page Views:
1427
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