Pi - I\'m going to give you one of my in-depth critiques. I decided that even before you asked for it, since I think you need it the most out of the submissions. I don\'t know when it\'ll show up, since I have to put aside at least an hour to do one of those things.
Zato - a lot of dialouge. I\'m not complaining, I think the pacing and progression worked well, but I suggest cutting it back a little. You developed both characters nicely, which would be great in a normal match, but a different set of rules apply here. Trim it down a page or two and focus on quality over quantity. I don\'t know who your next opponent is going to be, but odds are you\'re going to need to step up your game. I know you have it in you.
My apologies to Pi, since I\'m talking to Zato as if he already won, but a 60/30 split is hard to recover from no matter who you are.
Speed Death Tournament 2005: Round 1 / Galaxy vs. Bonnie & Buer
Critiques & Comments
# 8
Posted:
Jun 28 2005, 04:11 PM
# 7
Posted:
Jun 28 2005, 04:04 PM
Aww my god, I was about to leave just a beautiful commentary, and then I lost it!
Okay to sum up:
Pi- Don\'t let this hump slow you down. You got potential. I can see it. You had some nifty ideas in your story and the dialogue was pretty well thought out. I like how you at least took a chance by hitting different angles for your action. Work hard and you can take these concepts to the next level.
Zato- You impresed me a lot with this one, especially given the amount of time you had. Try to give your action shots as much attention as you give your shots of characters and scenery though, they\'re the parts that look obviously rushed. Overall you\'ve come a real long way since your first fight with Veiden and I actually hope I can grow equally as much as you have as time passes on the site.
Keep on keeping on!
Okay to sum up:
Pi- Don\'t let this hump slow you down. You got potential. I can see it. You had some nifty ideas in your story and the dialogue was pretty well thought out. I like how you at least took a chance by hitting different angles for your action. Work hard and you can take these concepts to the next level.
Zato- You impresed me a lot with this one, especially given the amount of time you had. Try to give your action shots as much attention as you give your shots of characters and scenery though, they\'re the parts that look obviously rushed. Overall you\'ve come a real long way since your first fight with Veiden and I actually hope I can grow equally as much as you have as time passes on the site.
Keep on keeping on!
# 6
Posted:
Jun 28 2005, 02:16 PM
Thanks whoever you are. I seem to be getting a lot fo running my mouth on the forums, which is to be expected.
Yeah, I know I crapped out on this one, and props to Zato for pulling through with an awesome rendition of my character. And although I know what I did wrong, that doesn\'t mean I wouldn\'t like some feedback. I crit other people\'s stuff to the best of my ability, and I would appreciate it if others would do me the same courtesy. Don\'t worry about me being sensitive to that shit or whatever; if you have something to say, then say it, as plainly and openly as you can. This whole site is about learning, and just assuming that I know what I\'m talking about when I critique the works of other people is one sorry way for me to learn. I crit what I see, and when I\'m crunching down on my own time I hardly ever see what\'s wrong with my own stuff. So please, don\'t be assholes and just leave the damn comments, yeah?
Funny thing is that I was hoping I could use this battle as a way of showing the Council how much I was willing to work hard to get into Void. Sadly, I\'m afraid I\'ve done just the opposite.
Yeah, I know I crapped out on this one, and props to Zato for pulling through with an awesome rendition of my character. And although I know what I did wrong, that doesn\'t mean I wouldn\'t like some feedback. I crit other people\'s stuff to the best of my ability, and I would appreciate it if others would do me the same courtesy. Don\'t worry about me being sensitive to that shit or whatever; if you have something to say, then say it, as plainly and openly as you can. This whole site is about learning, and just assuming that I know what I\'m talking about when I critique the works of other people is one sorry way for me to learn. I crit what I see, and when I\'m crunching down on my own time I hardly ever see what\'s wrong with my own stuff. So please, don\'t be assholes and just leave the damn comments, yeah?
Funny thing is that I was hoping I could use this battle as a way of showing the Council how much I was willing to work hard to get into Void. Sadly, I\'m afraid I\'ve done just the opposite.
# 5
Posted:
Jun 28 2005, 01:11 AM
Indeed, good reading from both.
Pi: What can I tell somebody who just seems to know it all, and yet has nothing to show for it in return... nothing really, moving on!
Zato: This was too easy for ya wasn\'t it Um... not much to say except maybe we should of seen some extra gore at the end ... just a thought. But Great battle man!
Pi, you\'ve got a long way to go, nice knowing galaxy, keep it up or something?
Pi: What can I tell somebody who just seems to know it all, and yet has nothing to show for it in return... nothing really, moving on!
Zato: This was too easy for ya wasn\'t it Um... not much to say except maybe we should of seen some extra gore at the end ... just a thought. But Great battle man!
Pi, you\'ve got a long way to go, nice knowing galaxy, keep it up or something?
# 4
Posted:
Jun 27 2005, 10:52 PM
Wow...good little stories from both of you...very pleasing reads
pi - since your such an art expert and give out tons of advice, I don\'t need to tell you what you did wrong here
Zats - I\'m laughing out loud here. Very very entertaining. Your level of humor in your comics always makes me smile. Artwise I know you could have done a lot better, but this is still great. Props to zato, you get my vote.
pi - since your such an art expert and give out tons of advice, I don\'t need to tell you what you did wrong here
Zats - I\'m laughing out loud here. Very very entertaining. Your level of humor in your comics always makes me smile. Artwise I know you could have done a lot better, but this is still great. Props to zato, you get my vote.
# 3
Posted:
Jun 27 2005, 01:55 AM
UPLOADED. BANG.
# 2
Posted:
Jun 26 2005, 05:34 AM
Dude, this is by far one of your coolest characters, Zat. She has \"draw me\" written all over her O_O
# 1
Posted:
Jun 24 2005, 09:29 PM
... Go Zato!
Speed Death Tournament Match
Drawing Time:
1 week
Ended:
Jul 3rd, 2005
Votes Cast:
28
Page Views:
1765
Winner:
A Bad Idea
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