[Ossification]

Name: Fife Pine

Age: EHHHHHHH that's rather private, isn't it?

Height: 5'10

Sexual Preference: Stalking people Watching couples through their windows Pan.

Occupation: Purveyor of high quality cannabis and freshly harvested organs

Species: Frankenstein (not to be confused with the pronoun Frankenstein).
Notes: Not actually dead at all, frankensteins are a human-like race, with the notable exception of being able to replace any damaged or missing body part (aside from the brain) with one from a donor. Some limitations exist, such as the age of the replacement part and time limitations for replacing major organs. A heart, for example, needs to be replaced with a new one no older than a day deceased within around 45 minutes of the frankenstein's ceasing to function, as after that brain damage may occur. New parts actually adapt and permanently attach themselves to the body in a fairly normal healing process.
Other notes include low physical sensitivity and high pain tolerance, so that the injured frankenstein may repair themselves quickly. The thread a frankenstein uses is actually self-produced, a silk sac similar to a spider's within the throat allowing for easy self-repair no matter the environment.



 Personal History: That's also private. But, well, it's not interesting or anything, anyway. Just grew up with his half-sister, who had a bit of a bad luck curse on her or whatever, so their grandma sort of raised them both with assassin's training so they'd survive past puberty without being killed. But now his sister is badass enough on her own that she doesn't really need Fife to protect her anymore, so he needed to find something else to do with his life. Void City seemed like an interesting place, and it's been fun so far. Although, ever since he came here he's been hearing this weird song that's been driving him crazy...

Contents of pockets: A joint, a sharp knife, and some dried corn. You know, for birds.

[Animeshen]

FIIIIIIFE

[Kozispoon]

Let's see some comics, post haste!

[Mister Kent]

Very intricate design--I'd be interested in seeing it in motion. Looking forward to the intro comics.

[tylerkendo]

Please update on this, waiting forwarding in looking your work.

[Animeshen]

I'm checking in from time to time on Skype and she is working on intro pages lol

[Ossification]

NOW WITH ROUGH SKETCHES OF THE INTRO COMIC

As you can see, my strong points are making faces look pretty, and my weak points are absolutely everything else. So feel free to tell me about possible improvements

[Kuro]

With the name, I want to make atcq references but feel they'll be lost on you.

The two stand outs to me right now are the bg & the text. with that establishing shot, it feels like you drew eveything on a diagonal instead of actual perspective. getting the lines right will sell it better. with the text, as it is, it's sitting huge, the justification seems awkward, & I think you could find a more suitable font. And in that last panel, the way you have it laid out seems odd. Rule of thumb is left to right going down. the girls balloon sits lower than his response, which seems off.

there's a lot of optimization you could do with the actual layout to make it more concise.like the same medium shots in the bottom tier of the first oage & top of the second. they don't feel necessary & it gets monotonous/same-y to keep showing the same angle like that.

I'm also getting the impression that you're a little scared of drawing hands & avoiding them strategically. But know that in actually getting them in there is how to improve them.

[Animeshen]

*raging inferno of excitement FIIIIIIFE!* AHHHH I cant wait to fight him!!
I have a couple questions- like I know you don't tend to prefer digital, are you going to ink and paint this traditionally? I ask because theres an orange smear on page two and I was wondering how you were going to go about that lol. I also feel Kuro is right about your word balloons, especially on the last page, they're a bit confusingly placed. and yeah we need to get you a new font, don't worry baby I show you XD lastly i think your hoodlum looks a biiiiit too much like Fife, maybe give him a broader face or different nose or mouth or maybe mustache. you could make him an ugly fucker, he dies anyhow haha.
I feel like I won't be impartial so I'll let other people critique the rest for me but i got my thoughts in. I'm sooooo ready for you to come play with me!

[Puzzlething]

   Nice to see you posting a comic dude! That like automatically puts you above most people. I can't even count the amount of peeps who just disappear into the incubator like ghosts, it's so depressing.

I agree with Kuro that it seems like you're kinda trying to jury rig your perspective. Do you know how to do technical perspective? We have a thread for it here http://entervoid.com/index.php?topic=10652.0  and I could red-line your first panel if you really need help, just ask. It's pretty simple once you get the hang of it. I do like the opening shot, it's a nice interesting angle to view the street at.

I think the comic is good as a rough draft, you know, to get the placement of stuff down. Before you ink it, make sure you go over it again and carefully build in the structure of everything. Try to be more exact and spartan with your lines, instead of getting all sketchy and loose.

Also, what are you using for post-scan corrections? Both your design sheet and intro pages need to have their levels corrected so that you don't have those large dark shadows and smudges on the page. It's such an easy thing to fix (once we know what you're using) and it's getting in the way of your pretty art!

    Again, it's awesome you worked on your pages dude. Making comics is hard, and plenty of peeps ever never get even this much done.

[Kozispoon]

I love how this is totally Shen's disciple. Your styles are totally reminiscent! Moar, I says!