Motivation Part I / Hara and Huey

Motivation Part I — Hara and Huey

by Hellis

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for Hara and Huey
55%
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Critiques & Comments
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cats
Artist
41 comments
# 10   Posted: Oct 21 2017, 10:35 PM
Starting the comic with the emotionally charged bathroom scene and leading it to that creepy unhinged smile at the end was something else. All that rage he holds inside is intriguing and I’m more excited to see how he continues to develop. I’m also eager to see what else is in store once we get Huey’s comic. I'm curious to see how they compliment each other///

 The colors have already been addressed but a little tip I use with my art is putting a correction layer over it and turning the saturation all the way down. When things are in grayscale, it’s easier to see which colors need to be adjusted.

Flutterbyes
Artist
299 comments
# 9   Posted: Oct 21 2017, 09:18 PM
Now that's some showing and not telling. I'm wondering if there could have been more dynamic staging in the first two pages, both of the action and for establishment.

zee
Artist
132 comments
# 8   Posted: Oct 21 2017, 08:51 PM
Great work, you've visibly stepped up your game again!
Short but sweet; it's interesting to see how Hara deals (or, maybe, doesn't deal??) with his demons and how he hides them behind hubris and B L O O D L U S T.
It's also amusing to see how Huey is totally used to his angsty behavior ha ha.
Overall I agree that this is your best work to date. I do like these colors, but I also agree that you might choose to experiment further with the saturation levels between the characters and environments, just so that the characters POP a little bit more.
As far as visual storytelling goes I do think some of the panels, especially the flashbacks on the first page, could have benefited by occupying more space to make them feel more significant. They do say what they need to (and I like how they're colored), but they feel a little cramped and I think they could have had a greater impact if they had taken up more of the page. That's just my opinion though, take it as you will!
I know I've said it before, but you are continuing to improve and I can't wait to see the next part!

William_Duel
Community Manager
943 comments
# 7   Posted: Oct 20 2017, 10:55 PM
Hey there is a definite difference and improvement with each and every new comic which is nice to see.  I wonder if it's because you're pushing yourself because I'm seeing a lot of changes for better.  This is some interesting color work and your best up to this point.  This is a nice four pager that helps us get into the character's head a little and will be an invaluable tool for future comics.  That being said, there's also plenty to work on.  

There is definitely some nice coloring which pops.  I do think you need some more midrange values especially for the backgrounds.  You were helped by the use of reds, but it's a pretty strong oversaturated color.  So as you dive deeper into color and color theory beware of using saturated colors.  

The problem with your shading is a very common one with digital colorists.  I get it, you're in a rush, you don't have many techniques yet so you just scribble here and there in an attempt to mimic shading.  For you, I'd look into cell shading techniques.  One of the best ways to do this, particularly in ps, is to use the lasso tool.  It'll be your best friend.  I'm assuming you're using PS like many people so basically start a new layer, use lasso tool and hold shift.  Create selections and these shapes are going to be your shadows.  You colorfill and ta-da you're done.  If you're not going that route, then at the very least clean up your shading so that it's cleaner, smoother shapes and not just squiggles.  If my advice wasn't clear enough, there's plenty to look up in terms of shading tutorials online.  You're also gonna need to practice shading in general and obtain a general understanding of lighting and how shadows form.  Those fundamentals are key.

Anatomy is something that all artists should continually practice regardless of style or experience.  There's a few places where you haven't built up the underlying anatomy and structures.  It's particularly obvious whenever you draw someone from behind so I'd look for more reference and practice that more.  You've also got a bit of long face syndrome going on.  It's usually a telltale sign that people who start from anime influence struggle with.  Be careful of how long you're drawing those noses.  For side views, you're going to have to draw skulls larger than what you think they are.  There's a lot of space there.  Just keep at the anatomy stuff and you'll get better at it in time.

I like seeing you attempt things with perspective and background.  Page 3 is the nicest of these attempts.  But the first thought that comes to my mind is to question you about your influences.  What sci fi do you like?  What do you like to draw from?  I'd reference those elements and try to incorporate them into your design elements.  Looking at that panel on page 3, comparing it to the interiors of the ship as you draw it throughout the comic, there's not a good sense of scale here.  This is a pretty cramped bridge.  The paneling on the walls makes it look like they're locked in a plain box.  I'm just not feeling the sci fi here.  And this is where you're gonna need help from your influences and references.  You've got a general idea of where everything is and what it looks like.  Just reference machines in general.  Look up science equipment, look up cars, motors, engineering designs, ship designs, and try to incorporate elements into your backgrounds.  You don't have to be super detailed but you need enough detail to sell the idea that this is a complex sci fi background.  I felt this when you introduced this character: that you were making quite a leap between your characters that I felt you might not be quite ready for yet.  I could be entirely wrong in that regard though, and maybe this is what you need to push yourself.  Draw what you like but don't be afraid to show your influences on your sleeve.

I like the variety of designs in your side characters.  A lot of beginners will make such characters pointlessly generic but kudos for making them all individual and interesting designs.  

Also does this dude not bleed?  If he gets cut like a regular person that he probably should have been a little injured from smashing his head into the mirror.   A little blood streaking down his face would have been a nice way to illustrate just how messed up this dude could be.  

Nice improvements dude, keep at it.

Majikura
Artist
469 comments
# 6   Posted: Oct 19 2017, 09:45 AM
I am really not a fan of how everything sort of had the same color saturation?  Especially with Hara's skin and the metal backgrounds.  More spot blacks and shadows would help make the characters pop out more, because right now they kind of just meld into the background...even when you use bright reds.

Sean
Artist
382 comments
# 5   Posted: Oct 18 2017, 09:36 AM
I have to say, this is your best work to date. These colors are rad. It gives me such a neat early sci-fi-fi feel to the comic. I also love this little dive into Hara as a character. That face smash into the mirror gave me a flash back to Henry Rollins punching the mirror for Black Flag's Damaged album. So fucking tight. My only suggestion is opening up with an establishing shot to kick off the comic. I think a whole a page of the exterior of the ship would of done a lot more justice for setting the scene later on.

Looking forward to Huey's Motivation comic!

Pocketmouse
Artist
101 comments
# 4   Posted: Oct 17 2017, 12:28 AM
Aaaahaha wicked! Looking forward to Hueys too.

I just wish that ...
I just wanted him to have a cut on his face form the mirror lmao sorry! (That's a shitty thing to say to a finished comic you've worked hard on) and the last panel with the grin and some blood running down would have been a good pay-off. That's my only niggle sorry! OTL Forgive me for my stupid desires!

Okay my real actual comment below:
This was a tanalizing taste of the direction you'll take Hara in, I wonder how different Huey will be? They seem like a yin/yang set up right now. This was a good introduction to the crew and dynamics of Haras mind. Your backgrounds felt solid and your characters are in them nicely, so well done for giving us a look at the ship. A widershot of the helm would be just fab next time if you feel like tacking it! ;)

Can't wait for Hueys!

yarnwitch
Artist
303 comments
# 3   Posted: Oct 16 2017, 06:40 PM
Hara is unstable! Oh my! I wanna see what he's up to next. I'll echo the red/green over the subdued purple. i think it wouldn't look so clashy if there was more background shading. that might help? its worth experimenting with at least. awesome comic!

Desichan
Artist
183 comments
# 2   Posted: Oct 15 2017, 10:59 AM
Nice job Hellis! Pretty neat comic, it's short, and tells a nice cohesive story! I feel like coloring could be a good thing to keep working on! From seeing your earlier things, its pretty clear you've been doing your best to work on your coloring, and your efforts have definitely payed off, however you colors have a tendency to clash, or overpower the scene. I feel studying color theory could work out really well for you! I think your lining is pretty good, and most of your panels in this comic read really well if you ask me, except when Hara bashes his head into the mirror. Overall though, this comic is really neat, and congratulations on getting it up! >w<b

Hellis
Artist
286 comments
# 1   Posted: Oct 14 2017, 01:40 PM
Part 1 is focused on Hara. Part 2 will focus on huey.

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Ended: Oct 21st, 2017
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