Tag Team Magical Girl Death Tournament / Flechette LaFayette and Faustina LaFayette vs. Melody Wynter and Devil's Tooth

Tag Team Magical Girl Death Tournament — Flechette LaFayette and Faustina LaFayette vs. Melody Wynter and Devil's Tooth

50.3%
928 points
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Crit level: No preference

by Pro-roro and Nothin

49.7%
918 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques



Critiques & Comments
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Julz
Artist
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370 comments
# 5   Posted: Mar 4 2019, 06:27 PM
KENTSHO- Nice composition, i love the set up. Love how much detail was put into page 3 panel 1. Page 5 third panel- i think you wanted to go for a top down perspective? But the head looks a little stretched.  The little fungis are really cute <3 Nice work!
PROTHIN- lovely lineart. Nice perspectives. Wow Devils tooth is one curvy lady :0 Very basic death tourney story, doesnt really do it for me in that department, though it might for others.

ArtsandGoodies
Think Tank
icon
167 comments
# 4   Posted: Mar 3 2019, 09:07 PM
Kentsho- Out of all the battles this one has the story most fitting for a magical girl theme and feels like a story out of an actual anime so good job on that part and setting up the arc. I do also like the grayscale for this comic and even though you couldn't get it in the last two pages the style still worked. I didn't mind all the set-up and not having much of the fight since this is a type of story I like. However now that that has been built up in future comics you hopefully will be able to spend more time on the characters.

ProThin: I only realized it when I was drawing character headshots but I love devil tooth's design. I love the art in this, both of your art works pretty well together, However the lack of story is kind of a shame since the characters just show up and fight. I do like the dialogue between them though and deviltooth is a pretty cool character. Just hope to see more story next time since the art is solid.

Gregly
Artist
icon
124 comments
# 3   Posted: Feb 28 2019, 01:51 PM
Team Flock U- I love the scene at the beginning with the helicopter! You do a good job of setting up the fight and an arc for the tournament but it all gets resolved pretty quickly, and offscreen mostly. I want to see some girls do magic! The spore cloud at the beginning makes it seem like Team Outlast is going to be more of a threat than they ended up being.

Team Outlast- I love the look of these pages, they're clean colorful and poppy! It's very easy to read the action and tell whats going on. It would have been nice to see Melody making the spore cloud, since it ends up leading to Team Flock U's defeat... but I guess that's unnecessary because we as readers know where it came from. It's just a bit odd that Devil's Tooth gets a transformation sequence but we dont get to see Melody's. This comic is pretty tight overall!

yarnwitch
Think Tank
icon
270 comments
# 2   Posted: Feb 26 2019, 08:35 AM
OKAY SO

KENTSHO - i love the background and setting you gave to this, it gave it some real good weight and I felt very engaged. Upsettingly one of the pages repeated and threw off the flow a bit.

NOTHRORO - This is super cute! I'm guessing nothin's lines and proro's coloring? either way i enjoyed some of the cleverness, but I feel like the setting just couldn't measure up after reading the other comic. It was fantastic and made things very light-hearted even with death involved, it just felt a little flat premise-wise. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE devil tooth's speech bubbles though. I am not gonna be over that for a while.

Both teams did really well and I'm excited to see where things go from here!

SirJellyRaptor
Artist
icon
52 comments
# 1   Posted: Feb 26 2019, 07:43 AM
Kent & Tensho: a very solid comic from you guys, I can definitely detect Kent's hand in the writing. I only have one real issue and that is that Faustina is convinced that they can get through this ordeal without nthe need for violence but we don't see much struggle with that. We get a cut to some world building then to her partners fight and when we cut back to her she's already done the deed. I think we need a bit more focus on that, to see this confrontation go down and know what ultimately makes her kill Melody, since this is played as a big character moment.

Pro & Nothin: Short, sweet, and to the point. Not much in the way of narrative but it serves it's purpose just fine without it. From a visual standpoint the spore smog feels a bit out of place, being a more dirtied tone among the otherwise pastel features of the comic. On the one had it's a bit jarring going from page 6 to page 7 because of this but on the other it conveys what it is well because of it's handling, it certainly doesn't look like something I'D want to be breathing in. I guess it's not a real criticism, just something to think about

Comic Details -

 
Type: Death Match
Drawing Time: 2 weeks
Ended: Mar 4th, 2019
Votes Cast: 24
Page Views: 608
Winner: Mister Kent and Tensho

 

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