ArtsandGoodies: Yarn: Those 5 pages in one day is amazing and you're super strong as an artist to be able to do all that. I also love this inkwash style of this. I am a little confusedc as to what happened on page 3 since to me it looks like Keito is what causes the gurder to drop yet is somehow faster than it and able to get sumiko out of the way. I will also say Sumiko is not a likable character her but I feel like that may be what you're going for, right now she's kind of a bitch and angry at everyone. Now if you want to make her likable there are a couple ways you can do that (of-course likability is super subjective but i hope these ideas can help). The first couple ideas I would have mainly involve selfawareness on her end realizing how much of a bitch she is. In the first idea she is aware of it an enjoys it doubling down and being more exaggerated if you want her to stay an unlikable character this way she can be unlikable but more fun/interesting. The second one would be more serious where she realizes she's such a bitch and has to come to terms with it in ways that result in some sort of pain for her. There are plently of other ways you can take her but those are the first two i thought of and if you want her to remain unlikable that is also legitimate.
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Sumiko's personality is intentionally abrasive, she needs to keep people from liking her. It will develop a bit over time. I appreciate the tips!
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You got some good angles (especially the shot of Keito looming over Sumiko on the I beam. With the height you managed, I'm disappointed to find you didn't utilize the size of your page to enhance the fall. The events pile together on your page in an effort to fit, the fall doesn't have that bang that I think the impact was supposed to have.
JELLYRAPTOR- You got some really great flow and motion with panels that are pretty static. That's no mean feat! I especially love that first page. The flow of the melody leading us into getting a look at Sumiko was really pretty. I unfortunately don't have much to say on the story as I feel we didn't even get there. For what its worth,your build up was promising. I only wish we got to see the guitar off.