okay 
hey guys, very ambitious entries! good good. I wouldn\'t comment on the story wise, but I have a few grimes about drawing wise-
xtem : I think it\'s good you\'re experimenting with your new style, but I have to say that in order to pull that kinda style off, you gotta know really well about shadow placement and where to put thick and thick lines. your lines atm is all thick and the shadow often makes no sense, especially if you look closely on how you slap downs hadows on clothing and muscles. They all look too curvy and far too unnatural even for a style. you might want to study more about shadow placement, it\'s really hard to pull off a noirish look if you\'re not comfortable enough with that. Also I think you could improve on your anatomy, some proportions especially on children is a bit disconcerting, matilda often seems to have huger head than she should. you gotta be more consistent on that. I like the wide array of expressions you have, by the way, better than before, but yes, you probably also want to try working on different variations of human body types.
Also I can see why people think yoru comic is confusing, it\'s back to the lines again. Your lines are pretty uniform (panels, baloon words, characters and backgrounds) that is why it is a little harder to decipher especially on screen. So I suggest you try more on deciding what lines are best for what, like for example maybe your paneling lines is thicker and your baloon words lines are thinner, and thinner background lines with thic character lines, and so on and so forth.
Do not stop experimenting!
Nachte: cool, tho I have to say I am sorry that I also find your style similar to monday atm, normally I would not say it, but after reading your entry, I couldn\'t really shake off the feeling. I don\'t know why, I liked the confident lines you had in your previous comics, I am not sure why you wanted to switch it but maybe you\'re experimenting! The reason it looks like monday\'s style I guess the fact that it;s really really loose, and chaotic. And also assymetrical. Also the fact that the way you give hint of crosshatching have similarity to monday\'s early style. I am sorry to be a downer but I am just trying to make some sense out of the style/ Do not take this in a bad light. But I do want you to reconsider your previous confident lines though, but yeah!
I have always liked your creativity in storymaking, but I think you lack variety in showing the characters stance, maybe you should try doing more crazy angles for crazy scenes, or dynamic poses. I mean I like the variety of close ups and what not, but I seem to see alot of shots from direct front, and it makes teh characters look stiff. human body is a very cool thing, there\'s alot of curves that expresses characters personality/state of being just from their body language, so yeah, I think you would benefit from that, especially with the nature of your characters
keep practicing!
Approval Committee
pity to see jong default too. :c
sixtem, I tried reading yours when the pages were mixed up and got really confused and didn\'t finish.. then with the pages in order I still wasn\'t entirely sure what was going on, though I did make it through the end. and I can\'s say I really care for the look of your comic. while the attempt with heavy black shading is admirable, you\'ll need more practice to get it down. good call with the grey tone though I\'d say.
nachte, yours was a more interesting read for me and kept me more engaged. some of the pages look sloppy or rushed too [is that pencil I see?]. I personally didn\'t get the Monday-esque feeling immediately when I read it, but now that it\'s been mentioned I can see it. just keep on your toes about it, and from the comments I\'m getting that this is something new for you, so keep at it and practice!