rofl, I wish there was more here! I'd have cut you more slack if this was a one-weeker. I like the non-bipedal sweet itch, though margot's anatomy is a bit off. I thought the last panel was pretty good, though it's a bit big, which makes it hard to take it all in at once without scrolling, which takes away from it.
sean, good! I like seeing you get more effort in your comics. I'm thirding the panel border thing. and seconding the expressions. I can appreciate you trying to get some creative angles in a few of your shots, even if they are a bit off. definitely work on observing real people though, your hands and walking poses could use it.
Sweet Itch vs. Margot Seraphina
Critiques & Comments
# 11
Posted:
Nov 6 2014, 11:21 AM
# 10
Posted:
Nov 5 2014, 05:03 PM
ROFL- Not gonna lie, when I popped into your livestream to see this being worked on, I was excited to see what sort of set-up story you would have that built up to this point. Because it really is a 'whoa!' surprise moment. I'm a little disappointed that there is no set up. They just get to banging. Granted, I agree with Kent that Seans comic works as a nice prologue before we get to reading yours, but I would've liked to have seen more of your work.
LURKER SEAN- I'm gonna agree with Kura. This was such an impassioned conversation that built up to what I thought would be an explosive end as Sweet Itch walks out, but none of that shows in their body language or facial expressions. You could change the dialogue to be a chill convo about their tax returns and the comic would be little affected by it. Maybe its just my cartoony penchant rearing its head, but don't be afraid to punch up your character expressions and posing. No one wants to see characters in the same pose every panel. Use each square and fill it with something engaging and interesting. It'll keep your reader turning those pages!
LURKER SEAN- I'm gonna agree with Kura. This was such an impassioned conversation that built up to what I thought would be an explosive end as Sweet Itch walks out, but none of that shows in their body language or facial expressions. You could change the dialogue to be a chill convo about their tax returns and the comic would be little affected by it. Maybe its just my cartoony penchant rearing its head, but don't be afraid to punch up your character expressions and posing. No one wants to see characters in the same pose every panel. Use each square and fill it with something engaging and interesting. It'll keep your reader turning those pages!
# 9
Posted:
Nov 5 2014, 12:48 PM
Lurker Sean: I kind of wish I got to see more facial expressions from your characters. Aside from page 6 panel 3, all your characters just look like they're bored, and with the hazy border-less panels combined with the pastel colors it feel like this is some kind of dream sequence.
# 8
Posted:
Oct 31 2014, 09:35 AM
Roflqu's comic works as an epilogue to Sean's, or even a prequel..
More in-depth commentary to come!
More in-depth commentary to come!
# 7
Posted:
Oct 30 2014, 11:33 PM
Pretty sure it uploaded.
# 6
Posted:
Oct 24 2014, 06:52 PM
I was looking forward to this battle before it was cool
# 5
Posted:
Oct 10 2014, 11:04 AM
This is something I've been wanting to do for awhile now. Stoked
# 4
Posted:
Oct 10 2014, 11:01 AM
I want this blessed union to make a beautiful comics baby! Good luck you two!
# 3
Posted:
Oct 10 2014, 02:24 AM
YEEESSSSS
# 2
Posted:
Oct 10 2014, 01:19 AM
SWEET ITCH IS BACK. YES.
# 1
Posted:
Oct 9 2014, 01:09 PM
whoa cool! cant wait!
Regular Match
Drawing Time:
2 weeks + 1
Ended:
Nov 6th, 2014
Votes Cast:
22
Page Views:
1521
Winner:
Sean
Intro Story
King
@ 3:09 PM Mar 28th
Monsters of Nature
Dairyu vs. Rickter & Gus
@ 2:22 PM Mar 28th
Help Needed
Theakon
@ 8:41 AM Mar 28th
Clash of the Chitin 2 Round 2
Myrmidon vs. Husk vs. Spidella Widows vs. Rod Chirpwood vs. Mizz Bonzai
@ 7:31 AM Mar 27th
The End of Extinction
@ 11:35 AM Mar 26th
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
|
294 Guests, 3 Users
(1 Hidden)
[] [Global Moderator]
Most Online Today: 351.
Most Online Ever: 1,184 (Jan 13, 2020, 06:21 PM)
Artist
I think it would've been way funnier if you had stretched out the middle pages and made them have a really angry sex conversation about that subject, rather than just boiling it down to two kinda generic stances on the matter in a single splash panel. It also would've given you some build-up for the joke on the last page, which was still p funny though!
Sean -
Oh man this was really surprising! It's really nice, I like the softness of everything. I think the first page was especially nice because you kept more of a variety in in your colours. They got a little samey later.
Also, the whole line-less background thing looks super nice, but I think your linework would've fit with in a little better if you'd used coloured ink or paint instead of pure black. It would've helped preserve that soft look of the comic more. I've used brown ink a whole bunch, and it's a lot of fun.