Haley vs. Gossamer Swan

Haley vs. Gossamer Swan

by Red

53.8%
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9Page 10Page 11Page 12Page 13Page 14Page 15Page 16

Crit level: No preference

by JCee

46.2%
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8

Crit level: No preference



Critiques & Comments
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JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 48   Posted: May 16 2011, 12:02 AM
Oh well. I had fun first battle.

Thank you heaps, Red.


Angie
Council
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1937 comments
# 47   Posted: May 14 2011, 09:45 AM
You can get good lines out of Photoshop with the right brushes, the default brushes are kind of meh for drawing. This illustrator put up an illustration brush pack that they use

http://fox-orian.deviantart.com/art/Essential-Illustration-Brushes-117211736?q=boost%3Apopular%20drawing%20brush%20photoshop&qo=16

I personally use

http://anjinanhut.deviantart.com/art/awesome-PS-brushes-giveaway-140905313

but it gives off more of a brush inked feel which can be hard to control in the beginning, but if you're wanting to do something clean with them, it is possible if you take your time, it's what I'd used for http://angieness.deviantart.com/art/Design-Sheet-Closer-View-208006557?q=gallery%3Aangieness%2F1935453&qo=11

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 46   Posted: May 14 2011, 09:21 AM
If you have Leopard or Snow Leopard as your OS then your computer comes with "boot camp" which allows you to partition your hard drive for windows and OSX. You just need a copy of windows on a disc, and it does everything for you. It's really easy, but if you don't have a copy of windows handy then Painter might be easier. But, go with whatever program or method will get you the nicest lines. Slowing down drawing very carefully in photoshop might give you the same result... drawing larger then shrinking the whole image usually makes lines look cleaner as well.

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 45   Posted: May 13 2011, 11:57 PM
I'd love to try out SAI, but I only own a MAC and cannot figure out how to split the system to share Windows with it.

I do have Painter 11, so I could try drawing my comics with that and then touch it up in PS.


Coatl
Artist
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318 comments
# 44   Posted: May 13 2011, 06:48 PM
if anything, I'd say do your line art in pencil tool. it'll look jagged, of course but once you shrink it it'll look better.

Charlie
Artist
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725 comments
# 43   Posted: May 13 2011, 06:25 PM
I'm a strong advocate for SAI, I use it more than I use Photoshop for my stuff these days. Almost 90% of what I do is all SAI.

PyrasTerran
Community Manager
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1392 comments
# 42   Posted: May 13 2011, 04:35 PM
Red is right: it's about the kind of artist you are. It's not that digital work is bad, it's just deceptive; it has its own unique set of challenges separate from traditional work. The biggest being balancing any digital filters or effects you use, implementing them in so subtle a way that they don't stick out like a sore thumb. As an artist whose work is usually entirely digital nowadays, this is the biggest challenge I face whenever I draw a comic. I've improved since my earlier work but it was a tough climb.

There are some artists who can create beautiful work that looks hand-drawn, and do so digitally, be it Photoshop, SAI, Corel, what have you. More important than the tool you're using is the way you use it.

William_Duel
Community Manager
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896 comments
# 41   Posted: May 13 2011, 04:21 PM
I'm not terribly experienced at doing digital work, but SAI seems to offer better control over linework so that might be something a digital artist such as yourself would like to try.

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 40   Posted: May 13 2011, 03:29 PM
"Icing on the cake" is a great analogy, but it's meaning is a bit different for someone who makes digital line art in photoshop like yourself.  Normally, this refers to someone who has hand drawn lines that are scanned into photoshop, then the artist adds photoshop effects... people sometimes rely on the program TOO much, and their actual drawings end up being weaker for it. Sometimes the computer makes things too easy for us!! I would aim to make your line art strong enough to stand on it's own before you add anything else in photoshop like lighting effects or filters or even color. If you try to make your lines stand up on their own without anything else helping them, people tend to make stronger line art ... thicken up the strokes when you get to an area that is in shadow, add more detail to empty spots and backgrounds etc etc. The only part that really stood out was the brick wall ... but don't worry, overall your comic was really good :)

You really are doing great so far, for someone hasn't drawn comics before this you really have a good understanding of pacing and storytelling. I'm sure you learned a lot from this too (so did I!!)  I hope you battle again soon!!

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 39   Posted: May 13 2011, 02:03 PM
@ Wei - I'm not disappointed that people are finding flaws and such. It stings badly, yes, but I want to know where my flaws lie.

If not PS, then what would you recommend for drawing comics?


Red
Council
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635 comments
# 38   Posted: May 13 2011, 02:03 PM
I hear ya, I hear ya... don't stop loving me!! I definitely need to learn to make shorter comics, the parts that I am really happy with are the parts that I spent the most time on and looked up references when I didn't understand how to draw something. I definitely realized my mistakes immediately, just had no time to fix them. Next time I'll try to cut it to less than 10 pages ... Honestly, I had planned for a few pages after the last one, but had to cut it short. But, I'm at least happy to hear that the story was enjoyable to a few people.

Wei Ingnan
Artist
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597 comments
# 37   Posted: May 13 2011, 09:03 AM
Tatsura: when I was very small a  distant relative of mine brought a cake when he came to visit - it was covered with sugar flowers and three different kinds of icing - it obviously took a lot of extra time and effort and was I suppose quite expensive....and it was the worst cake I ever ate....I couldn't eat an entire piece the icing and everything else was so overpowerlingly sweet and sticky thick....I think I passed out with a tummy ache after teariing apart the house on a sugar high

Photoshop for comics is like icing on a cake - it should enhance and improve.or only be used as a finish or for post production.. not to cover up and overpower.....I would like to see you make a comic without using photshop at all or at least as absolutely little as possible

don't be discouraged by people giving you pointers or pointing out flaws....find the fun in the comics and the process....people are trying to help you not discourage you

Red: you need to practice your anatomy on headshots or I will stop loving you......you attempted a lot of brave angles and quarter profiles but you didn't pull them off....slap someone inna swivel chair and get to work sister......and like William said you have to work on a consistant level of execution......you got a bit sloppy and rushed

      Edited May 13 2011,  09:44 AM by Wei Ingnan

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 36   Posted: May 12 2011, 11:23 PM
@ William Duel - Fair enough. I'm still trying to get the hang of comics since I've never drawn them before. Thanks for the pointers.

@ Orange - Thanks. Despite all the flaws pointed out, I'm still having a good time with this.

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 35   Posted: May 12 2011, 08:17 PM
William_Duel: macguffin
Quote

Hahaha I had to google that, but yeah I didn't want him to become that ... I just wanted to progress the story a little before he became real. Soldat (god rest her soul) had to come in and make her question herself before he appeared. This seemed like a good time for it. Thanks, bros.

Charlie
Artist
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725 comments
# 34   Posted: May 12 2011, 07:26 PM
I guess I haven't commented on this one yet. Anyway, I do agree with what Willie D said for the most part and I don't really have much more to add to it than that. Great fight Red, and nice first battle Tatsura!



      Edited May 12 2011,  07:26 PM by Charlie

William_Duel
Community Manager
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896 comments
# 33   Posted: May 12 2011, 04:17 PM
Wow that is really fuckiing annoying.  I wrote out a nice long crit and everything and it didn't go through.  So...I'm gonna try this again but maybe it won't have as much as I originally wrote.  Here goes:

Red: Backgrounds are wonky at times with not enough detail and too many stray lines.
Nice to see story move forward, Sinclair seemed like a macguffin at times so nice to see something happening.
Needs more varied angles and adventurous compositions.  Page 3, panel two, the coloring and lighting is super nice right there and I'd like to see you do that more consistently.  Anatomy and quality inconsistent.  Page 7 is my favorite.  

Tatsura: You're like Pyras in that off the bat your first comic shows your overreliance on PS.  Textures bad, need to be worked into the art more.  Good work effort on the cityscapes.  Street level not so much, use photo refs.  Page 5, characters don't belong on the page.  They are shaded and are very bright but no obvious light source and the environment is too dark.  Not enough details.  Not a fan of GS's up up and away schtick I think her flight patterns should reflect her as a ballerina.  If not check out Storm or wind Dancer from the Xmen for examples:
http://images.wikia.com/powerlisting/images/6/63/WindDancer.jpg
http://media.comicvine.com/uploads/0/455/101824-174815-wind-dancer_super.jpg

Sorry for the poor writing, I was trying to paraphrase myself.


JCee
Artist
icon
344 comments
# 32   Posted: May 10 2011, 02:13 PM
@angieness   Yeah, I now see how bad PS's textures can be. And thanks a bunch for the examples.

@mrnoitaull Thank you.

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 31   Posted: May 10 2011, 10:30 AM
@michaelharris - Thank you, I'm really glad to hear that it was an easy read. I'll continue to work on anatomy, I definitely mess up when I'm rushed.

@Angie - "I kind of wish the comic had been a bit shorter so they could have all looked that lovely, because I noticed the quality dwindled here and there." Oh god, I agree! I really need to learn to make things shorter, I tend to make things 15 pages long no matter what. Even in the SDT I had that problem. I end up sacrificing quality in a few places in order to just get it all done. Page 3 was the first page I did, which is explains why it's the nicest one haha. Glad you liked my Re-cap haha.

@Mrnoitaull - "I WILL say that I love how Red's dialogue,paneling and colors convey a mood that I get/feel while reading."  That's really great to hear :)

Darius Corry
Artist
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426 comments
# 30   Posted: May 10 2011, 08:50 AM
Most of my criticism runs parallel to what the others have said so I'll refrain.

I WILL say that I love how Red's dialogue,paneling and colors convey a mood that I get/feel while reading.

While with Tatsura's bold yet calm contrast with the execution of both characters were done very well.

Good job, folks.

      Edited May 10 2011,  08:51 AM by Darius Corry

Angie
Council
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1937 comments
# 29   Posted: May 10 2011, 08:27 AM
Red-It's going to be lame to say this but I like the font on the recap page a lot haha I felt like your coloring really came a long way on this one, page 3 is probably my favorite I've seen you do before. I kind of wish the comic had been a bit shorter so they could have all looked that lovely, because I noticed the quality dwindled here and there. I do agree with Michael that the anatomy could use some work, while you've improved on it, it looks like you're having some difficulties with sitting poses and action. For example, the bottom of page 5 she's looking really stiff and awkward, it would have helped to have her lean forward so it'd look more aggressive and natural. I liked the story overall, I look forward to seeing how Haley will get out of this one.

Tatsura-a very nice first battle, I liked the story a lot because it was very sweet and unexpected. I thought it was a nice twist that she wasn't going to turn Haley in. Definitely stay away from the Photoshop textures, the brick wall on page 2 really stood out amongst the really smooth soft coloring you had. Texture can be an awesome tool to use, you just need to use it in a way that blends well with your art and coloring style. These examples are from one of my favorite colorists, look at how he uses texture very subtly on the buildings and mechanical objects, they don't look jarring

http://martegodpopo.deviantart.com/art/WARBOUND01-stablishing-shot-74826201?q=gallery%3Amartegodpopo%2F62803&qo=161

http://martegodpopo.deviantart.com/art/Arrow-Head-Deadpool-11-124022008?q=gallery%3Amartegodpopo%2F62803&qo=71

Provided your coloring style is significantly different but it's still a good example of texture use.

JCee
Artist
icon
344 comments
# 28   Posted: May 10 2011, 12:28 AM
michaelharris: Its mostly on the textures, like the dots on the pants and the brick wall. Those would look better drawn. The outer glows get a bit much, but don't draw attention to themselves as much.
Quote

Ahh, fair enough.

michaelharris
Artist
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352 comments
# 27   Posted: May 10 2011, 12:00 AM
Its mostly on the textures, like the dots on the pants and the brick wall. Those would look better drawn. The outer glows get a bit much, but don't draw attention to themselves as much.

Coatl
Artist
icon
318 comments
# 26   Posted: May 9 2011, 09:48 PM
I wanted to make an effort in drawing backgrounds and cityscapes, but yes perspective always gets me in the end. I could never fully understand the theory behind it.

If by photo-shoppy, are you referring to the filters (ex, like the walls and outer-glows)? If so, I'll make an effort to steer away from using them in the future.


Quote

actually the outer glow is not bad.

JCee
Artist
icon
344 comments
# 25   Posted: May 9 2011, 01:31 AM
I like that you tried some city scapes in here, I would encourage you to find some tutorials and one, two and three point perspective. Also look at reference of cities and draw from that, instead of memory. I want to see you try drawing by hand, I think it would look a bit more organic. The art, as it is now, feels very photoshoppy and it tends to highlight the flaws in your drawing skills. You do a good job of moving the camera around and making interesting shot choices. Keep working on anatomy too..
Quote

I wanted to make an effort in drawing backgrounds and cityscapes, but yes perspective always gets me in the end. I could never fully understand the theory behind it.

If by photo-shoppy, are you referring to the filters (ex, like the walls and outer-glows)? If so, I'll make an effort to steer away from using them in the future.



michaelharris
Artist
icon
352 comments
# 24   Posted: May 9 2011, 12:51 AM
Tatsura, I like that you tried some city scapes in here, I would encourage you to find some tutorials and one, two and three point perspective. Also look at reference of cities and draw from that, instead of memory. I want to see you try drawing by hand, I think it would look a bit more organic. The art, as it is now, feels very photoshoppy and it tends to highlight the flaws in your drawing skills. You do a good job of moving the camera around and making interesting shot choices. Keep working on anatomy too.

Red
I like your coloring and your palette choices but I really want you to get some stronger anatomy under your belt. There are a lot of places where it completely overwhelms me and I can't pay attention to the panel. Especially McBastard's arm on page 15. I would suggest the same thing about perspective to you as well. It was a unique interesting story and was an easy read.

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 23   Posted: May 8 2011, 04:10 PM
Yeah, it was purely unintentional. We must be psychic or something...

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 22   Posted: May 8 2011, 04:08 PM
eee! I love how you drew her hair :D Haha, and you made her so pretty! I loved yours, I was not expecting that to happen in your story! Hahaaha and our first pages ARE very similar.

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 21   Posted: May 8 2011, 04:01 PM
That's creepy! Your first page looked like mine!

Overall, great work, your art has improved from your last comics.


JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 20   Posted: May 8 2011, 03:36 PM
Yay!

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 19   Posted: May 8 2011, 03:25 PM
uploaded :D

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 18   Posted: May 7 2011, 09:11 PM
I thought I could finish it tonight but I'm falling asleep haha. It's 95% done!

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 17   Posted: May 7 2011, 06:26 PM
Only 2 days away! I'm excited AND terrified. (prepares for the coming pelting of harsh criticism)

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 16   Posted: May 3 2011, 05:39 AM
Chavis02: Well I will vote for "Gossamer Swan Comic" it's interesting story. :D
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6 more days until you get to see the comics you're voting on. Right now there are 8 comics in the Comics To Vote On section, this one isn't done yet!

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 15   Posted: May 2 2011, 08:54 PM
Chavis02: Well I will vote for "Gossamer Swan Comic" it's interesting story. :D
Quote

Hello, welcome to EnterVOID.

That's sweet of you to say, but I think it'd be best to wait til the actual voting begins. And there's more to just liking the comic, you need to state why you think so and what could be improved.

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 14   Posted: Apr 30 2011, 04:02 PM
Only 9 days left...eeeek I'm so excited why can't time go faster? XD


Red
Council
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635 comments
# 13   Posted: Apr 25 2011, 03:29 PM
Wow!! I'm like halfway done, I believe...

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 12   Posted: Apr 25 2011, 02:20 PM
tdkgunghoul: But there's still 14 days on the counter. :O.
Quote

I found a lot of free time to myself ^^

And will do.

Ten Dead Kings
Artist
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269 comments
# 11   Posted: Apr 25 2011, 06:57 AM
But there's still 14 days on the counter. :O

Now that you've finished it so early, I recommend you to look back at what you've done
and see what can be improved/expanded/worked on.

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 10   Posted: Apr 25 2011, 03:46 AM
Right, I've finished and uploaded my comic.

I hope I did a good enough job, since I'm still a newbie to all things comics. I'd appreciate any critiques you can give me. Redrevolver, I really enjoyed drawing Haley, she was such an interesting character.





Mister Kent
Artist
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939 comments
# 9   Posted: Apr 24 2011, 07:50 PM
Can't wait to see Swan in action and Haley back in the game! Good luck!

JCee
Artist
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344 comments
# 8   Posted: Apr 22 2011, 07:02 PM
Only 17 days left, and I don't feel as nervous as I was earlier. Still, I'm making good time.

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 7   Posted: Apr 10 2011, 09:29 PM
Mrnoitaull:
RedRevolver: Good luck Tatsura!! I'm excited!!! This is my first battle since I lost in the speedy death tourney.... over a year ago!!
Quote

HOLY CREATOR THAT WAS A YEAR AGO ?! 'the hell the time go?
Quote

I KNOW!!! It definitely doesn't feel like it was that long...

Darius Corry
Artist
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426 comments
# 6   Posted: Apr 10 2011, 08:05 PM
RedRevolver: Good luck Tatsura!! I'm excited!!! This is my first battle since I lost in the speedy death tourney.... over a year ago!!
Quote

HOLY CREATOR THAT WAS A YEAR AGO ?! 'the hell the time go?

DelBarrio
Artist
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426 comments
# 5   Posted: Apr 10 2011, 06:59 PM
O MAI this is gonna be a fun'un. C:

Wolcik
Artist
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492 comments
# 4   Posted: Apr 10 2011, 12:58 PM
Red watch out Ballerinas BE CRAZY!!

Angie
Council
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1937 comments
# 3   Posted: Apr 10 2011, 11:47 AM
Yay! Good luck kids!

Dimension
Artist
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489 comments
# 2   Posted: Apr 10 2011, 09:48 AM
I'm am excited too! :D :D :D GOOD LUCK GUYS~

Red
Council
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635 comments
# 1   Posted: Apr 10 2011, 09:10 AM
Good luck Tatsura!! I'm excited!!! This is my first battle since I lost in the speedy death tourney.... over a year ago!!

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 4 weeks
Ended: May 15th, 2011
Votes Cast: 31
Page Views: 1609
Winner: Red

 

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