Sentai Tournament / Nemutai Tenshi vs. W-Warriors

Sentai Tournament — Nemutai Tenshi vs. W-Warriors

by Qyzex

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for Nemutai Tenshi53.2%
962 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7

Crit level: No preference


by Wolcik

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for W-Warriors46.8%
845 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8

Crit level: No preference




Critiques & Comments
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Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 29   Posted: Feb 9 2009, 12:31 AM
Thanks all. Thanks Wolcik. Good battle man!

JoshuaEliGilley
Artist
462 comments
# 28   Posted: Feb 7 2009, 12:40 PM
Qyz:

Man, that looked good for a week, and it's amazing you fully colored it!
Narrative was clear, I liked the dialogue and how you showed off the dial attacks.
Wasn't really feeling the sound effects on a lot of it, not becuz of digital, but see if you can design that typa stuff into your sketches and it won't be as much of an afterthought, and will be much more awesome, and also better at conveying the sound. But props to you for designing the different font for different attacks, I enjoyed that.
One more thing may be my personal pref. but I don't like the balloon tails with the square ends, would like to see them pointed. not sure why, but it REALLY bugs me XD sorry!
You handled the three Ws well, nice job!

Wol:

Good drawings here, I think you're anatomy and proportions, etc.. are getting better compered to previous battles. 1st page the last 2 panels, the figure is looking strong.
Overall, I think the art lacks contrast, You need some more black in there, or at least tones or something.  I imagine you were going to color this, but ran out of time. either way some more spot blacks would make your art look a lot better even if you are coloring. I notice when I force myself to do it, I learn alot about light/dark balance and shading.
Story was ok, I know it is hard to have "good guys" kill a character, but I don't think Mr. Ws long monologue was really necessary. He basically justified verbally why the W warriors might have to kill in the future... eh... a little too blunt, was like he was explaining the tourney, but we all know the deal so.. you could've had more interesting speech there or made the fighting longer, anything else.

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 27   Posted: Feb 6 2009, 11:24 AM
Thank you for the feedback and critique AVT and Angie!

I will try my hardest to do better in the future.

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 26   Posted: Feb 6 2009, 08:56 AM
Qyzex-This is a lot stronger than the stuff you've done on Void in the past which made me happy. I didn't really mind that Tenshi seemed kind of overpowered. I mean honestly, had you made it seem like a struggle this could have been a bitch to keep a manageable page count. (and just taking them all out at once wouldn't have really helped either) It seems like you're getting more comfortable with coloring which is good, try to start pushing your color palette more. This was a good start!

Wolcik-Story wise I kind of enjoyed this one a little more but Tenshi's death didn't really have the impact it could have, considering the way the W-Warriors were reacting to it. While it was good to show the warriors had some sympathy, it was a little lost when you just skipped past the battle, the actual death, and went right to the character's reactions. Art wise it was on par with what you normally do, which is good. But your backgrounds are still feeling crazy empty.

Wolcik
Artist
492 comments
# 25   Posted: Feb 4 2009, 01:58 AM
I was going to color it all, but to honest I drawn sketched panels and some ink on second day and than didn't do much untill last day. I drawn almost everything on sunday, so it was over 12 hours of drawning and than trying to fix it on PC, but when I was putting the dialoques, my head was already hurting from lack of sleep (so I didn't check it with spell-check).

Baratacom: I know that Blue yawning is making Tenshi look weak, but Green wasn't suppose to run to avoid attacks, but run away and don't come back untill everything was over.

Brittnay O'Hop: The reason why I went with the report instead of showing Tenshi going berserk, was because I wanted shorten the page count - it was easier to draw them just standing, than fighting.

Qyzex I didn't draw those balls to Tenshi's costume, and I'm overally sorry that I did just a poor job - I didn't even title the last page "Tenshi's Alternative Deaths"


What I hate the most is that I didn't get to use more Blue's texts e.g. I could be more awesome, only If I were born a twins.

AVT
Artist
62 comments
# 24   Posted: Feb 4 2009, 12:57 AM
You both did well with the time available.  Just getting that out of the way.

Qyzex:  I liked how you displayed Tenshi's range of powers and resourcefulness first and foremost.  Some of the sequences particularly in the beginning, with Tenshi wondering what the hell he's going to do to defeat each warrior was pretty funny and well-written/plotted out on the pages (page three, right before he's about to freeze Green Warrior: "What the Fuck are you--" "Shit, gotta think fast...") .  I also liked the delivery sequence of Tenshi freezing Green Warrior, and pushing her over to shatter on the ground. It was kinda one of the BAMF moments, and my favorite part of the comic.  The way you pulled off Blue Warrior's arrogance as if it were an afterthought to his statements (DON'T PLAY DUMB! <So fucking awesome.>) were a nice, humorous touch.  As the comic progressed from the midway point of your pages, I found that Tenshi's thoughts, and the dialogue, were somewhat forced and lacked that creativeness that Had Me in the first half, thus resulting in a somewhat anti-climatic ending...  Don't get me wrong, I understand that Tenshi eventually finds himself grasping at straws, so to speak, but I was probably hoping for a little more "OH SHIT PANIC" from him in regards to defeating the Blue Warrior...  I was really looking for something more at the end.   But, then again, you had said that you decided to "shorten it" to save yourself drawing time, "...and it didn't turn out too well."  Nonetheless, I definitely consider this a nice solid installment of Tenshi's role in the tournament.  Very good for you!

Wolcik:  I loved the last page.  
I had a very difficult time reading through your comic, because your panels were so dialogue-heavy with explanations and clarification as to the what exactly happened to Tenshi, and the Wolcik Warriors' mission.  I would have really liked to SEE Tenshi destroy himself, as opposed to it being reported to The Boss after the fact...  That's simply an opinion though.  Otherwise, I wasn't particularly lead to believe, in the panels leading up to Red Warrior contacting The Boss, that Tenshi was on the brink of self-destruction.  There was no climax, or peak, only a minor climax at the end where the Warriors mentally gear themselves up for what's to come.  

It's nice that you were able to state the Warriors purpose in this tournament, but I still think that it would have worked a lot better had you broken up the dialogue with more panels--EXCITING panels, despite the static, action-less sequences; maybe slightly varied angles, as well as evolving and changing emotions and expression as Red Warrior relays the information to The Boss and shows Blue Warrior holding up Tenshi's body, and the Boss's evolving reaction as he explains what is to come for the Warriors as the tournament progresses.  I would also consider taking a little extra time to proof-read through your text; a couple spelling corrections could be made (believe) and perhaps you could edit out unnecessary words ("About <that> today's report...")  I would have loved to see more varied line widths considering you went with a really sporadic toning-approach.  The contents within any given panel may be very self-explanatory to many here, but my eyes positively get confused by under embellished contours, and also extremely high contrast contour and shapes...  As I said, I loved the last page.  I actually got to see the Warriors in action in a clever way, as opposed to the one-shot one-panel route you took at the bottom of page four to display Red's flexibility, Green's speed, and Blue's...well, awesomeness.  

But, my lovelies, I'll reiterate:  you both did well with the time available, and you ought to be proud that you brought your goods to the table.  As always, you can take what I've said here with you to the next round, whoever will be going on from this point....or do whatever you find is in your best interests.

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 23   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 08:17 AM
True Story: I had actually planned for my comic to have the W-Warriors pretty much DESTROY Tenshi the entire comic, and that the killing blows would be lucky desperation moves. But I decided to shorten it, to save myself drawing time, aaaaand that didn't turn out too well.

And the lightning scene: Now that you mention it, yes, I should have went that route.

thank you :3

Baratacom
Artist
36 comments
# 22   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 04:28 AM
I actually enjoyed both comics, though both have room for improvement.

The biggest problem I saw in both is that the opponent is too weak; such as Blue Warrior yawning when receiving the attack (sure, he's a beefy one, but he should still feel some pain); this problem however hurts Qyzex's entry more since he is up against 3 characters, which just make Tenshi seems "OMFGOVRPWRD!!", this could've been fixed if at least his armor were broken/significantly damaged by Blue's punch.

Another one for Qyzex, I believe that the electrification scene would look better with solid black shadows instead of just "darkened blue".

Faux
Artist
32 comments
# 21   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 08:01 PM
Q- cool comic. I really like the angles and colors you use. I was very entertained. Some of the dialogue have me laughing out loud. Very smooth. I would suggest you work on panel variation though.
Wolik- I like how you draw faces, but I would work on backgrounds and line variations.

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 20   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 07:37 PM
I was really disappointed in my comic too. I can do better art than that, I know. And I can write better stories. But I rarely can mesh the two into a comic. If I make it through, I'll sure as hell try harder.

jv7x
Artist
99 comments
# 19   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 06:00 PM
Both comics felt very bland.  The stories both felt pretty formulaic and as a result I wasn't that invested in either.  I kinda felt the same way about the art as well.  It did a good job of showing what was going on but didn't pop in my mind.  As far as scoring goes, I'd have to give the edge to Qyzex.  Whoever makes it to the next round, I'd really like to see the story and art take a bit of a leap forward to really make your entry stand out.  

Good luck to you two!
JV

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 18   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 03:26 PM
But that would mean mine entertained me.... HMMM.

sawbones
22 comments
# 17   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 12:35 PM
I wasn't blown away by either comic, but Wolcik's seemed much more like it was meant to entertain a reader, and not just the creator.

Both comics could have used stronger writing, but then again, this is sentai. I guess writing was never that genre's strong point.

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 16   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 09:24 AM
AAAAAHAHAHA. Dude. Your comic should have been like that last page! That would have been the best!

Thanks for the battle, man. It was fun!

Wolcik
Artist
492 comments
# 15   Posted: Feb 1 2009, 09:59 PM
OK, I uploaded my part too and it seems working.

I'm very sorry that it's so... well, it looks like one of my first battles :( I wanted to color it, but I didn't manage my time well enought.
It's all Harry Potter's fault, he made me read his last tom :P I'm very angry at my self and I don't belive that I could make it to the second round with something like this. However I do have next battles's plot scetched in my mind - in case of defaults - but Quiz-X didn't, and that's awsome :D

Anyways, can't wait to see all those battles :)

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 14   Posted: Feb 1 2009, 05:34 PM
You're all good Qyz, everything seems to be working fine on all the people that have submitted thus far

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 13   Posted: Feb 1 2009, 05:19 PM
I uploaded my pages. If there are any problems, contact me, and I'll mail them in

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 12   Posted: Feb 1 2009, 09:19 AM
It seems people are having issues uploading battles at the moment. If you have problems, email your pages to me and Wei. You can find our contact info here http://entervoid.com/board/index.php?topic=3218.0

xerxyz
2 comments
# 11   Posted: Jan 31 2009, 09:25 PM
Do it Qyzex! Get 'em brotha! *horns*

Darius Corry
Artist
443 comments
# 10   Posted: Jan 28 2009, 04:10 AM
So excited I had to do a Battle Hype!

Lazereyes
Artist
128 comments
# 9   Posted: Jan 27 2009, 10:09 AM
wooo! go go go

Wolcik
Artist
492 comments
# 8   Posted: Jan 26 2009, 11:18 AM
Good luck Qyezex, I hope you won't kick my ass TOO much XD

bicentennial man
Artist
55 comments
# 7   Posted: Jan 26 2009, 08:34 AM
chamone noaw

Aluísio C. Santos
Artist
735 comments
# 6   Posted: Jan 26 2009, 04:18 AM
UhOh

Sageby
Artist
13 comments
# 5   Posted: Jan 26 2009, 03:40 AM
Good luck

E.W. Schneider
Artist
1070 comments
# 4   Posted: Jan 25 2009, 10:57 PM
SHOW US GUYS

Delani
Artist
14 comments
# 3   Posted: Jan 25 2009, 10:02 PM
Whoo, good luck, sweetie <3

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 2   Posted: Jan 25 2009, 09:33 PM
Good luck you two!

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 1   Posted: Jan 25 2009, 09:29 PM
Oh man Oh man.

Good luck, dude!

Comic Details -

 
Death Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Feb 8th, 2009
Votes Cast: 45
Page Views: 2224
Winner: Qyzex
 

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