Sentai Tournament / The White Light vs. Takahashi

Sentai Tournament — The White Light vs. Takahashi

by Knomer

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for The White Light51.9%
1102 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5

Crit level: No preference


This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for Takahashi48.1%
1020 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8

Crit level: No preference




Critiques & Comments
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JoshuaEliGilley
Artist
462 comments
# 30   Posted: Feb 8 2009, 02:47 PM
Knomer:
Art was really cool, some of my favorite from the tourney. On some action shots you may benefit from choosing angles that more clearly show shillouettes/actions of characters, and in general pulling back the camera more. Like how the sentai aspect was a daydream, a real nice read.

Pong:
Art was cool, liked the colored washes, maybe it coulda used more black fills. Storywise, I liked the character interaction, but it didn't do much else for me, probably cuz i missed the references.


Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 29   Posted: Feb 6 2009, 08:45 AM
Knomer-I really like your expressive inks and the toning was nice. It may have been better to vary the tones just a little since at the moment everything has almost the same shading so it can get difficult to differentiate objects from one another. I liked that you added your own little spin on the story even though it was mostly just a fight sequence, the ending was a funny surprise.

Pong-The inking was pretty solid and I liked the warm tones some of the panels had. I didn't really get into the story but I liked that you had a more unique take on the tournament instead of what most others were doing.


jv7x
Artist
99 comments
# 28   Posted: Feb 5 2009, 08:56 AM
I'm getting in here a little late so there is not alot that hasn't already been said.  I'll keep it short.  

Knomer: I loved this entry.  You get my vote.  I thought the art was top notch and the story was funny and action packed.  What more could you want, I say.

Pong: I liked the art in a few pages, especially page 6.  The story was ok, but I didn't roll out of my chair.  I'll admit I didn't know who Commodore Perry was either.  I thought it was a joke about the guy from Friends.  But a quick trip to Wikipedia settled that.  Anyway, still a solid entry.  Good job.  

High marks all around,
JV

ChrisAdrift
18 comments
# 27   Posted: Feb 4 2009, 08:52 PM
Knomer--Nice stuff.  Maybe try lightening up the tones in some places for clarity's sake, but I didn't really get lost as to what was happening.  
Heh..killing Takahashi off, embarrassing him in public like that...Either way, but I prefer this version

Pong--Wow, you got something against White Light? Seems ya took the "emo" a little too far there..
The rest of the story..a mix between laughs and WTF's for me... Am diggin' the art, though.  

Knomer
Artist
87 comments
# 26   Posted: Feb 4 2009, 01:05 PM
thanks all for the crits and comments. While trying to make my story interesting i forgot to kill off takahashi.
"whoops"

Pong, like how you included my story and that our fighters dont actually meet, HOllA.

Jet: for tones i used black ink wash and a brush (it does wonders)

Jack
Artist
225 comments
# 25   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 09:22 AM
The idea of someone graduating American high school without knowing who Commodore Perry is may have just ruined my day. That's offensive on any and every level.

Pong, I really liked this but I wish you'd had enough time to finish. It is a bit of a let down as is. You kicked ass with the theme though, and totally made it a sentai story and not a superhero story. Good point for that.

Knome, this was for sure the best thing you've done on Void. The art is a little too sloppy in parts, but overall it's good work. I just wish this didn't read like such a standard story about people with superpowers.

Nice battle guys.

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 24   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 08:43 AM
I like how the two never meet. No where does it say they ever have to.
Takahashi is busy dealing with a "western menace"
And White Light is being emo elsewhere.
Unlike Phil, who doesn't seem to ever like Pong's comics, hah, I do. Sure, he underplayed White Light, but that's part of what's funny about it.

Knomer, your comic looked pretty good, and it made me laugh quite a bit too, good job!

bicentennial man
Artist
55 comments
# 23   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 08:34 AM
Knomer dat was fucking funny as hell nice quality and pacing it flowed very well
Pong im a big fan of your work but sometimes it goes over my head good art as usual tho

King_Pong
Artist
601 comments
# 22   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 06:06 AM
But less subtle phil, and it wouldn't allow for me to develop a continuous plot either.

Phill
Artist
895 comments
# 21   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 05:34 AM

If you believe that commodore perry is an obscure historical figure, then your schools have failed horribly at educating you.   Also, you might want to reread my Knome's character's bio if you're having trouble figuring out the story as relates to White Light.
Quote


Hi, I'm an American, not Japanese, our schools are shit compared to everybody else's. Also, despite my dropping out, the only things they taught me about history was pretty much the basics.

And now that I read his bio... I still stand by what I said. You have her acting emo, put in something that contributes NOTHING to the overall story, and have her die at the end. Having Takahashi walk up and shoot her in the face within 3 panels would be easier than that.

King_Pong
Artist
601 comments
# 20   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 05:21 AM
Well phil, midterms kicked my ass and I didn't have enough time to finish inking all of the pages.  I will be submitting the rest of the story either tonight or tomorrow as a beyond battle.

If you believe that commodore perry is an obscure historical figure, then your schools have failed horribly at educating you.   Also, you might want to reread my Knome's character's bio if you're having trouble figuring out the story as relates to White Light.

Phill
Artist
895 comments
# 19   Posted: Feb 3 2009, 04:19 AM
Not bad.

Knomer: HOLLA! So far I'm really enjoying your comic dude, mainly because it's not the "Meet greet and kill" storyline and instead we're seeing Takahashi's fantasy moment. The art was a bit messy, but you do make it work, but a little clarity in a few places can't hurt. Anything else from me is just nitpicking. Vote goes to you dude. HOLLA!


Pong: I'm trying to be fair about this, but there's two things on my mind right now, one is asking me "Which comic should of pong payed more attention to? Sentai or Artist battle?" and the second thought is one nasty thing you said to knome a few days ago in the DA chat about the character you're facing being so boring that you lost all will to do anything. Honestly David, Knome's character has at least some creativity, you just took the introvert and slapped on a Kamen Rider suit on him.

Story here... OK, I'm gonna admit that I do not like your stories, either there's something wrong with me lately and somebody needs to shoot me, or maybe there's something wrong with the story. Here's what I'm seeing: TWL is wondering if she's dead but doesn't realize it yet... a bit cliche but I dig, then we get to the middle where Takahashi meets up with the Commodore and fights him, and the ending shows that TWL has killed herself...

To me this is like flipping between two shows on the TV, one show seems good at the beginning, but when we make the switch to something with an obscure history figure that's being fought by a Sentai, and then we switch back to the ending of the first show and I'm left thinking "what do these two stories have to do with one another?" Yeah there's jokes, if you like the type that needs somebody explaining them to ya, but let's be serious here, if you're gonna have some plot to your story; the least you can do is follow through on it and not just drop it at the end like it's some kind of inconvenience.



Overall, good, but Knome gets my vote.

Jetaime
Artist
100 comments
# 18   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 02:17 PM
haha, got it.

King_Pong
Artist
601 comments
# 17   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 02:01 PM
I'm just drawing him the way Japanese people drew him in the 1850s (more or less).  It would be of relative importance if I continued the story.  But mainly it just looks funny.

Jetaime
Artist
100 comments
# 16   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 01:43 PM
pong: the art is great as always, and i agree with Craqued about the expressions. i'm wondering if there's a joke i'm not getting regarding commodore perry being drawn like a japanese guy...

knomer: the art is great---i especially like the tones. did you tone with marker? i want to try to copy that. i also laughed out loud at the ending.

Craqued
Artist
202 comments
# 15   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 12:30 PM
YAY. okay.
pong, story was funny and especially the character expressions, they always get me.
knome, that was lovely, all your drawings were really nice and it was also veryvery funny.

E.W. Schneider
Artist
1070 comments
# 14   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 12:18 PM
Does no one know who the hell Commodore Perry is?

sawbones
22 comments
# 13   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 12:05 PM
I'm with you. Commodore Perry. YES. It's not 'random'. It's AWESOME.

Knomer, your comic was pretty good, but I got lost on pages 3 and 4.

King_Pong
Artist
601 comments
# 12   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 11:15 AM
Knomer, artwise this is like better than most things you have done for void.  So, good show.

King_Pong
Artist
601 comments
# 11   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 11:13 AM
You should probably read more.

luniara
Artist
528 comments
# 10   Posted: Feb 2 2009, 11:12 AM
Knomer- decent art, good pacing. At first I thought it was going to be a normal "WE FIGHT NOW" thing. The ending pulled you through.

Pong - That had to be the most RANDOM shit ever, but it's the funny type of random where you sit and laugh with a bunch of "WTF!?"

King_Pong
Artist
601 comments
# 9   Posted: Feb 1 2009, 10:49 PM
uploaded.

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 8   Posted: Feb 1 2009, 09:19 AM
It seems people are having issues uploading battles at the moment. If you have problems, email your pages to me and Wei. You can find our contact info here http://entervoid.com/board/index.php?topic=3218.0

bicentennial man
Artist
55 comments
# 7   Posted: Jan 26 2009, 08:40 AM
give us your best

King_Pong
Artist
601 comments
# 6   Posted: Jan 26 2009, 04:26 AM
Don't worry.  There will be at least one smashad type face.

Aluísio C. Santos
Artist
735 comments
# 5   Posted: Jan 26 2009, 04:16 AM
If I dont see smashad faces, I wont come.

Delani
Artist
14 comments
# 4   Posted: Jan 25 2009, 10:09 PM
Oh snap... I smell utter destruction.

Qyzex
Artist
670 comments
# 3   Posted: Jan 25 2009, 09:35 PM
Oh man. Sexiness all around!

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 2   Posted: Jan 25 2009, 09:32 PM
WHOA IT BETTER BE

E.W. Schneider
Artist
1070 comments
# 1   Posted: Jan 25 2009, 09:29 PM
THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME.

Comic Details -

 
Death Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Feb 8th, 2009
Votes Cast: 49
Page Views: 2248
Winner: Knomer
 

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