HELF:
I liked the multiple alternate universe/story angle on this, it was pretty entertaining once I got into it. I also really liked how in some panels the character's dialogue would move to other panels via the word bubbles. Very creative on this. Artistically, I dig your style and it is quite detailed so no real problems but just keep practicing the handwriting and watch the negative space around your letters to keep it readable. (the mind usually recognises letters based more on the space around them then the shape of letter) It was kinda long, but overall it was a rewarding read.
DAWG:
You're drawings were more polished than helfs and I enjoyed how you used the colors to bring focus to certain elements in the panels. Also lot's of nice little details in the environment.
I'm not sure how I feel about the uneven panel borders, because your art is pretty tight so it kind of stands out compared to the loose border treatment, but thats just a personal preference. I was a bit confused on the first page (understood it the 2nd time I read it) about the fact that jingles had "died" in a wreck, maybe another panel or 2 to help communicate that? the "garage door" panel especially confused me. Also, I agree bigger pages.
Claymore vs. Jingles
Critiques & Comments
# 18
Posted:
Jan 7 2009, 01:07 PM
# 17
Posted:
Jan 7 2009, 09:38 AM
helf, yours kind of dragged at first but picked up steam as it went and got interesting. I think maybe it could have been shorter though.
I think I agree that this style could still use some work, but I don't know how. I want to say the panels need more unity, like that nice spread on page 5, but I'm not sure that's right. anyways, I do like this style.
dawg, I liked this lots and I don't know what crits to give that haven't been mentioned... um... you draw stars too even. do something about that.
I think I agree that this style could still use some work, but I don't know how. I want to say the panels need more unity, like that nice spread on page 5, but I'm not sure that's right. anyways, I do like this style.
dawg, I liked this lots and I don't know what crits to give that haven't been mentioned... um... you draw stars too even. do something about that.
# 16
Posted:
Jan 7 2009, 08:15 AM
i like the interpretations of each others characters in these. good stuff with little to bitch about. while dawg's was more polished, i really dug how helf presented everything in the 6 grid. good work both of you.
# 15
Posted:
Jan 4 2009, 11:44 AM
These are great comics, deceptively sophisticated on both ends!
# 14
Posted:
Jan 2 2009, 04:05 PM
Helftan-I really enjoyed the story here, I found it very touching. I think the pacing was very nice here and I liked your different interpretation of Jingles. I'm glad that you didn't fix *all* the grammatical/spelling errors that I'd found when I proofread because having your comic 100% grammatically correct and stuff would kind of kill the charm of your comics. I'm glad that you seem to be putting more effort into your Void comics lately which is great, but you could probably push the quality a little more and really make these comics shine. It wasn't quite on par with your last comic but it was up there. Keep going dude, I'm getting pulled more and more into your stories, I think it's because while you're still keeping some of the gore and Satan stuff, it's not a huge focus now. I can't imagine your comics without it but it's nice that you're not depending on it as much because it'd otherwise get super repetitive. Keep up the good work dude.
Dawg-This felt like a big step up for you artistically, it looks like you're getting a lot more control with your inks and they looked very slick here. I think my only complaint was the text was occasionally a little too small and jumbled together which made some parts difficult to read. Maybe make your pages a little bigger in the future so that's not an issue. Other than that it was pretty solid, I like the direction you're taking artistically so keep it up dude!
Dawg-This felt like a big step up for you artistically, it looks like you're getting a lot more control with your inks and they looked very slick here. I think my only complaint was the text was occasionally a little too small and jumbled together which made some parts difficult to read. Maybe make your pages a little bigger in the future so that's not an issue. Other than that it was pretty solid, I like the direction you're taking artistically so keep it up dude!
# 13
Posted:
Jan 1 2009, 11:03 AM
HELF- I really like what you did this this. I feel like this comic was more story heavy than your previous ones, which is good. Your art was very nice, but I wouldn't say it wasn't your best; the story, however, totally made up for this, and was the focal point of your comic. I liked the simple colors, and the cover is very nice as well. Overall, really nice job man. One of your best to date.
DAWG- Obviously you went with something different from Helf's, but I think you accomplished what you set out to do. I enjoyed the humor in your comic- I usually have a tough time finding Void comics funny, which I found yours to be. Good job.
DAWG- Obviously you went with something different from Helf's, but I think you accomplished what you set out to do. I enjoyed the humor in your comic- I usually have a tough time finding Void comics funny, which I found yours to be. Good job.
# 12
Posted:
Jan 1 2009, 02:06 AM
Wow.
That was great. Both sides really.
Helf that was actually probably your most entertaining comic you've done so far. After I read it I didn't think there was any way that Dawg would be able to compete. It's been a long time since I've read a comic by dawg where every page made me laugh, so it was about damn time this one had that effect.
I think I give a slight edge to helf on the basis of his creativity with narrative structure - but I thought both comics were excellently entertaining in different ways.
That was great. Both sides really.
Helf that was actually probably your most entertaining comic you've done so far. After I read it I didn't think there was any way that Dawg would be able to compete. It's been a long time since I've read a comic by dawg where every page made me laugh, so it was about damn time this one had that effect.
I think I give a slight edge to helf on the basis of his creativity with narrative structure - but I thought both comics were excellently entertaining in different ways.
# 11
Posted:
Dec 30 2008, 08:34 AM
Uploaded . . .
# 10
Posted:
Dec 25 2008, 08:06 PM
WHAT A TWIST
# 9
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 09:50 PM
mao mao
FABULOUSSS
FABULOUSSS
# 8
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 09:05 PM
LAST
# 7
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 08:59 PM
FIRST
# 6
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 08:41 PM
There will be handsome.
# 5
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 08:38 PM
Oh maan
# 4
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 08:35 PM
Real sexual people. . . But in a handsom world
+ Ronin you fail!
+ Ronin you fail!
# 3
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 08:34 PM
Now my Christmas is merry.
# 2
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 08:34 PM
first comment? come on, first comment!
wait, I need something that relates to this battle...
uhhhh..
IT's GOING TO BE AWESOME!
wait, I need something that relates to this battle...
uhhhh..
IT's GOING TO BE AWESOME!
# 1
Posted:
Dec 24 2008, 08:34 PM
uhoh was that a tripmine
Trophy Match
Drawing Time:
1 week
Ended:
Jan 7th, 2009
Votes Cast:
21
Page Views:
2315
Winner:
Helftan
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shhhhhh