thanks you guys i take everything into concideration
the next will be epic i promise

Good improvement jaws, I thought this comic was a pretty good read. Nice step up with adding more solid blacks to your inking, much more contrast than your last comic. I agree with others that you could even push the black fills a bit more and vary up your lines. If you can\'t get foreground separation this way, at least hit your foreground objects with a white outline to distinguish things. I thought nameless talked too much and should have been more mysterious, but whatever, nice one!

jaws, i gotta tell you man, this is a level up. good work!
my complaints are the same as the others. vary your lines. either through using different pens/brushes, or if you really have to (even though others advise against it, sometimes you have to) retrace the line to thicken it. things like borders to word balloons got muddied in with hatching on bricks & things. if you differentiate more, it\'ll make that shit not only clearer, but leap out. and when you\'re inking, use contour strokes. don\'t bring the pen off the page & make like your sketching when doing a solid line. towards the end, the line work got a little sketchy.
also, work a bit on your perspective some. that first page is nice, but with a little extra attention, it\'d be badass.
keep it up, man

-J

Oh, this is a small thing, but I thought it was kind of odd that Nameless used the name \"Red Rum RevolverZ\" seriously. It\'s kind of slangy and stuff and it just seems weird to see a guy like Nameless say that with a straight face.

I like that we got a peek into Ace\'s character a little more; it had this dark undertone suggesting something sinister about him. I\'m kinda excited to see where you go with that.

About the handwriting, I actually think it looks all right.. I tend to like handwritten text over digital, so I would encourage you to keep at it... However, perhaps you could spend a little more time planning it to make it look nicer--for instance, use a ruler in order to keep a standard size for all the dialogue. And stuff.

I think the yellow tones worked really well; they separated background from foreground and made the art a little less confusing in comparison to the black and white panels.

thanks when you put it that way Saint im just gonna have to plan even more

I think why it doesn\'t work is because you gotta think about about where you put in the thick lines. If you put some thick lines in the background and thin ones in the foreground it\'ll work against you. Like in the first page the outline of the building shoulda been thicker than the windows. The pillars that are meant to be a bit forward should be thicker than the lanterns to the right and at the bottom your guy should have a thicker outline than the buildings just left of him.
I really liked this comic. You get top marks for entertainment.

thanks Angie  i try to vary my lines but it never seemd to work

Damn, this was a big step up for you Jaws! You did some nice work on your backgrounds. I think the big thing hurting you though is your lack of line variation because I\'m having a difficult time telling the difference between objects since they\'re all blending together. Either bringing some more black into the objects or some more color might help. I think you could have really pushed the solid blacks and done some really cool stuff with that would have helped a lot. Look at Mike Mignola and Frank Miller\'s work for what you can do with solid blacks. (obviously you don\'t have to go as crazy as they do but it\'s worth looking into if you want a better idea of how solid blacks can be used) The story wasn\'t crazy original but it got the job done, I think you would benefit a lot from doing your text digitally since it got difficult to read from time to time.

Keep pushing yourself dude, it really paid off this time

Oh man Defaulting is such bad karma, is it cause your last opp skipped out on you Nin ?

damn now i knoe how it feels this sucks
better luck next time Nihinesjr

you too bra

I hope you guys like. Good Luck, Jaws.

Good luck on your battes, Lets see some improvements and good stuffs!

yes yes yes yes yes

\"Oh but if I had one heart I\'d name it after you, if only you had a name that could describe us two... ...wait, Rtv what?

I just grew tits.

Good luck guys!

i promise not to disapoint everyone this time

Ooo, I can\'t wait for this :3